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Today, my boyfriend told his friends he was dating me. We've been together for a year and a half. His friends didn't even know I existed before. FML

Today, my dad's order of hair clippers arrived. I've been putting off getting a haircut for a while now, and he offered to give me one for free. Long story short, he managed to ruin the hair clippers, and I now look like a diseased palm tree. FML

#21472769
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20852) - you deserved it (3077)

On 09/25/2015 at 11:40pm - misc - by paaaallllmmmssss (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, while showering I slipped and fell, taking down the shower curtain and smashing my head against the floor, resulting in a concussion. My family came running because of the noise and I lay naked, bleeding and concussed for few minutes before they could stop laughing enough to get me help. FML

#4548386
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46314) - you deserved it (3076)

On 08/15/2009 at 12:58pm - misc - by iltdtsm - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, my mum got upset with me for getting my first hangover ever after being of legal drinking age for over 6 years. She is a closet alcoholic in denial who hides red wine bottles around the house. FML

#7663968
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29672) - you deserved it (3076)

On 01/29/2010 at 12:49am - health - by mirrorfad - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out my dad has a 1-in-a-million disease that makes your liver process pain medication at twice the rate of a normal person. If that wasn't bad enough, he also tells me he hopes I don't have it too, because it can be passed down. He said this because I'm 29 weeks pregnant. FML

#15546650
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34418) - you deserved it (3076)

On 03/29/2011 at 2:08pm - health - by Spike (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while stuck in traffic on the highway, my 5 year old in the back seat asked me why the man in the car next to us was pulling on the other man's "peepee". FML

#17361677
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47581) - you deserved it (3076)

On 08/04/2011 at 12:04am - intimacy - by whatnot - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was cuddling up on the couch with my girlfriend, when my drunken mother walked in the room, slurred out, "Room for one more?" and leaped on top of us. FML

#18468865
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35148) - you deserved it (3076)

On 12/09/2011 at 2:38pm - love - by Vince (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was sitting under a rather large house plant in my dining room, minding my own business when a spider lowered itself right in front of my face. It startled me, causing me to gasp, which resulted in me inhaling the spider. I then spent 3 minutes choking on it. FML

#19998761
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28595) - you deserved it (3076)

On 08/02/2012 at 5:08pm - misc - by danonno (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a lady told me that I should sue whoever screwed up my "nose job" so badly. This is the nose I was born with. FML

#20983819
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42492) - you deserved it (3076)

On 12/07/2013 at 12:30pm - health - by :^( (woman) - Bahrain (Madinat)

Today, it was a hot day and a woman walking in front of me collapsed. I helped her up, and I called an ambulance while she laid down. While we waited, two teenage girls walked past and I heard one say to the other, "I love how this city just lets people tan wherever". FML

#21237053
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42649) - you deserved it (3076)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:02pm - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand

Today, I told my boyfriend how my mom died when I was 11 after crashing her car into a tree at night. He muttered "Women drivers." FML

Today, after vacuuming, I struggled to pull the nozzle attachment out. I yanked it too hard and it flew out, hitting me in the face and causing my head to jerk back into the wall behind me. My girlfriend had to drive me to the hospital for my concussion. FML

#21446817
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21926) - you deserved it (3076)

On 07/25/2015 at 12:20am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was walking to a meeting and saw two girls trying to jump start a car in the rain. Thinking I'd be a gentleman and help them, I offered to assist. The girl whose car is broken down looks at me, looks at her friend, and says, "I think we'd better call the police." FML

#130566
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42062) - you deserved it (3075)

On 02/25/2009 at 1:19am - misc - by Godfree (man) - United States (Florida)



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