Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I woke up to a loud crashing in the middle of the night. I went to investigate, but found nothing amiss. Nothing except an axe firmly wedged in my front door, that is. It's safe to say that I have no clue who did it, and that I needed a fresh pair of underwear. FML

#20999316
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44437) - you deserved it (2636)

On 12/20/2013 at 4:05pm - misc - by nopissleft (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, it was my birthday. Normally, the little office I work in throws a big party for every employee on their special day, but nothing was done for me, not even a "Happy Birthday" came my way. I didn't want to be rude, so I stayed silent. They didn't do anything because I was getting laid off. FML

#3298219
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59343) - you deserved it (2635)

On 06/28/2009 at 4:25am - work - by WitchQueenLiz (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I started dating a seemingly normal guy. Not even four hours into our relationship, he began telling me that he can see spirits, dead people, and that I have a large black dog following me everywhere I go. FML

#20155774
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22834) - you deserved it (2635)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:53pm - love - by holyshitbatman - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out my mother had remarried, and that I was getting a stepfather and stepbrother. However I found out about it 30 minutes before we left to pick them up from the airport, and also found out that I'm losing my bedroom. FML

#11895645
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38800) - you deserved it (2635)

On 07/15/2010 at 6:52am - misc - by photonut13 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was kicked out of a Family Dollar. My mom thought it would be fun to press all the buttons on the musical ceramic cathedrals so they would all play at the same time. FML

#13788203
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19693) - you deserved it (2635)

On 11/10/2010 at 8:16am - misc - by dearprudence89 - United States

Today, I woke 2 hours before my alarm was supposed to go off, feeling incredibly sick. I then ran downstairs and had diarrhea while I threw up. I spent Valentine's Day having diarrhea every time I coughed or sneezed. FML

#14983932
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27780) - you deserved it (2635)

On 02/15/2011 at 12:09am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was sitting at my favorite coffee shop, when a creepy 50-ish looking guy sat at my table. He asked if I'm into submissive guys, and if I wanted to dominate him. I'm a 17-year-old girl, and am now scared to ever go back there. FML

#20754256
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44471) - you deserved it (2635)

On 06/29/2013 at 1:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Czech Republic

Today, my ass decided that it was the perfect day to exhibit the diarrhea side-effect of medicine I'm taking. I definitely made a lasting impression on my interviewer. FML

#20846310
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38841) - you deserved it (2635)

On 08/20/2013 at 1:18pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my "best friend" stole almost $1,000 worth of electronics and video games from my roommates and me, just so he could pawn them off and buy himself a new car stereo. FML

#21355305
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30404) - you deserved it (2635)

On 02/13/2015 at 11:36am - money - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was informed from a fellow employee at a bar that he finally "hit" the boss' wife. I work for my parents. FML

#3168193
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66676) - you deserved it (2634)

On 06/24/2009 at 5:59am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, after spending four days having my resume, cover letter, and references proofread and perfected by professionals, I finally submitted it all to the summer internship of my dreams. I received a rejection letter ten minutes later. FML

#7437449
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26042) - you deserved it (2634)

On 01/19/2010 at 2:20pm - work - by PiMan (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, I stumbled across my ex's blog. Apparently, while dating me, he realized he was gay. Good to know the one guy I've dated, lost my virginity to, and fell in love with, was never truly attracted to me and was dating me just to be sure. FML

#19860254
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31397) - you deserved it (2634)

On 06/28/2012 at 11:28am - love - by FMlovelife (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend confided to me that he has a used condom collection. When I reacted with disgust, he "reassured" me that he only keeps the ones he uses with me. FML

#20036074
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30033) - you deserved it (2634)

On 08/22/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by WTF (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • Elaillce's illustrated FML
  • So, did you catch the game this week? You know, the one with the ball, the scoring and all that stuff. Isn't that how you're supposed to talk to people? OK, I know nothing about sports and teams, but I…

Friday 17 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: