Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had to listen to fellow classmates whine about selling one of their many houses, while I can barely afford to pay for a $100 textbook. FML

#20987288
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42724) - you deserved it (2956)

On 12/10/2013 at 1:04am - money - by thefifthdoctor - United States (Washington)

Today, a girl puked on me. No warnings, nothing. She just threw up on me, then walked off like nothing even happened. FML

#21271247
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41571) - you deserved it (2956)

On 10/05/2014 at 1:48pm - health - by Eww - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mom told me that her vagina is "as cute today as it was twenty years ago." FML

#21308358
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30861) - you deserved it (2956)

On 11/29/2014 at 9:06pm - misc - by justawallflower - United States (Ohio)

Today, after working for my company for 10 years, my co-workers threw me a farewell party. The boss gave quite an eloquent speech, ending in "we're really gonna miss you Mark." My name is Evan. FML

#163929
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64695) - you deserved it (2955)

On 02/28/2009 at 7:50pm - work - by Grrrrr (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got a call from my parents that they have decided to get a divorce. My brothers and I just shelled out $5,000 each and spent months planning their 50th Anniversary party that was supposed to be next month. FML

#3507672
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54230) - you deserved it (2955)

On 07/05/2009 at 4:12pm - love - by Annabelle (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my baby-crazy mother expressed her concerns that I haven't conceived after a whole two months of marriage. Her advice amounted to "get divorced while you're still hot, sleep around until you get pregnant, then marry the winner." When I complained to my father, he supported her. FML

#14545580
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35892) - you deserved it (2955)

On 01/11/2011 at 1:46pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend got mugged. I found out because the mugger had the courtesy to ring me, after I texted several times asking where he was, to say "He won't reply. He got robbed." FML

#13634930
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32605) - you deserved it (2955)

On 10/29/2010 at 2:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I woke up with a fever and a migraine. I work at an audiology clinic and my day consists of being shouted at down the phone by practically deaf people. FML

#15735853
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27812) - you deserved it (2955)

On 04/11/2011 at 2:23am - work - by owmyhead (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I went out to a restaurant with a girl I have been dating. The only conversation was about how proud she was of her fart during work earlier, and how she managed to clear out a section of the office. FML

#20133872
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21421) - you deserved it (2955)

On 10/26/2012 at 3:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was coming home from a much-needed vacation. The time I spent on the plane consisted of kids screaming and throwing tantrums. One of them managed to give me a black eye with a shoe. Their mom pretended to be asleep so I'd have to deal with her kids for her. FML

#20626326
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42919) - you deserved it (2955)

On 04/27/2013 at 10:30pm - health - by Satan'sChildren - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I got robbed. I just moved so I didn't have much in my new house. They did decide that my cat was valuable enough to steal. FML

#21271461
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45558) - you deserved it (2955)

On 10/05/2014 at 7:30pm - animals - by FML - United States (Texas)

Today, my dad was completely engrossed in a football game on TV, so, trying to be cute and funny, my mom flashed him. He didn't notice, but I did. FML

#13975253
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33303) - you deserved it (2954)

On 11/25/2010 at 1:33pm - misc - by blenderbookf (man) - United States (Arizona)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: