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Today, the waiter farted while I was on a date. My date thought it was me. FML

#13822249
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29736) - you deserved it (2681)

On 11/13/2010 at 12:13am - misc - by tmac05 - United States (California)

Today, the guy who got off when the elevator's doors opened had a very embarrassed look on his face. I didn't think anything of it till the doors closed. Turns out he was running away from his deadly fart. FML

#14242742
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24812) - you deserved it (2681)

On 12/18/2010 at 12:56am - misc - by lizard (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my mom sold our electronic stuff to pay for hurricane shutters. We live in Chicago. FML

#16801509
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31857) - you deserved it (2681)

On 06/22/2011 at 4:05pm - money - by knevs - United States (Illinois)

Today, while I was on stage dancing for a competition dress rehearsal, my top fell off, exposing my breasts. I was really embarrassed, but fortunately no one said anything about it. That is until a kid in the audience came up to me and said, "That was a disappointment." FML

#19737125
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24099) - you deserved it (2681)

On 06/05/2012 at 3:27am - misc - by KenzFell (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that my daughter's "pen pal" is really a 58-year-old man in prison. FML

#20109821
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23936) - you deserved it (2682)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:59pm - kids - by ohgod. - United States (Florida)

Today, I was watching TV with my mom, when a plumbing ad came on. A hot guy showed up on-screen and said "I'm here to snake your drain." My mom immediately piped up with, "Oh, I'd let him snake my drain any day." Thanks for that imagery, mom. FML

#20101823
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20578) - you deserved it (2681)

On 10/04/2012 at 7:24pm - misc - by disgusted (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boyfriend decided to give me my Christmas present early because he's going to his grandparents' house for Christmas and won't see me. I was excited, until I unwrapped a sweater that I left there a month ago. FML

#6865867
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26257) - you deserved it (2680)

On 12/21/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by anonymous - United States

Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment, when I came across a lacy black thong in the laundry. When confronted, he swore it was his. I don't know what's worse, the possibility that another woman left it there, or the idea that my boyfriend owns and wears women's lingerie. FML

#9037172
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26221) - you deserved it (2680)

On 03/13/2010 at 12:14am - love - by botharebad (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad came to visit me. By visit I mean he arrived, took a huge smelly dump and left. This is the first time I've seen my dad in months. FML

#16466098
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30758) - you deserved it (2680)

On 06/02/2011 at 10:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, after being terrified for years, I went on a plane for the first time. It was also the first time I "emergency landed." FML

#17291466
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32521) - you deserved it (2679)

On 07/28/2011 at 10:25pm - misc - by Alyssa Charlotte - Mexico

Today, I returned home from a two-year trip overseas. My mom's first words as she greeted me at the arrivals terminal of the airport were, "Your father and I are getting a divorce." FML

#20738269
52 comments

Today, I found out that I was conceived during a conjugal visit. FML

#6089701
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31891) - you deserved it (2678)

On 10/31/2009 at 8:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I witnessed the homeless man that visits my neighborhood placing bags containing his own poop in my trash cans. I later received a notice stating that the garbage company will not provide my residence with garbage service until I “refrain from placing bags of my own feces in the trash.” FML

#2339155
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48761) - you deserved it (2678)

On 05/27/2009 at 11:39am - misc - by Brook363 (woman) - United States (California)



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