Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was driving down a one-way street, when some raging dumbass came screaming the wrong way down the road at me. My instant reaction was to brake and give the guy a chance to do the same. His instant reaction was to keep going and wreck my car. FML

#20853636
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39587) - you deserved it (2724)

On 08/25/2013 at 12:23pm - misc - by hello higher premiums, fuckwad (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was chatting with my girlfriend and I asked her to give me her phone to make a call since mine was dead. A text came in from someone and the name sounded familiar. My bestfriend has been dating my girlfriend longer than I have, and she gave him head. I kissed her earlier that day. FML

#7350997
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22207) - you deserved it (2723)

On 01/15/2010 at 12:02am - intimacy - by vadoodoo22 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I grabbed a handful of crackers from the kitchen, only to find it crawling with bugs. Apparently, my brother had made the same discovery earlier, but put the box of crackers back in the cupboard anyway. FML

#13129116
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26239) - you deserved it (2723)

On 09/20/2010 at 3:26pm - animals - by thanksbro - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to the shops with my little sister. We had to walk through the lingerie section of the store to get to another part. My sister then yells at the top of her voice 'stop following me you freak'. I had security escort me out of the store, and got many dirty looks. She thought it was hilarious. FML

#8330425
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28191) - you deserved it (2722)

On 02/16/2010 at 3:18am - misc - by Timv86 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, an elderly woman was crossing the street and dropped her bag of groceries. I got out of my car to assist her, but she beat me repeatedly, yelling that I was "enforcing a stereotype". Sorry for trying to help. FML

#21277469
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33700) - you deserved it (2723)

On 10/14/2014 at 3:15am - misc - by I_AM_READING - United States (Alaska)

Today, I thought I was doing a nice thing when I spent hundreds of dollars to get my friend a plane ticket home. She yelled at me when I gave it to her. Turns out, she planned on spending a few more months freeloading off me. FML

#21311645
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29020) - you deserved it (2723)

On 12/04/2014 at 9:04pm - money - by yourewelcome (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I caught my neighbor picking my flowers out of the planter on my porch. When I said something to her, she ran off and knocked over the planter, smashing it. She is now acting like nothing happened. FML

Today, my grandma gave me a gift (something she has never done before). I was so excited until I found out it was one of her overdue library books on dolphins. I feel so loved. FML

#1620964
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43940) - you deserved it (2721)

On 05/04/2009 at 8:35am - misc - by hawtpinkpanties (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, there was a knock at my door, and I was greeted by a punch to the face. The man was the extremely angry "fiancé" of the girl I've been married to for just over a year. FML

#5287091
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53496) - you deserved it (2721)

On 09/16/2009 at 2:34am - love - by OhDamn (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, my boyfriend gave me a box of chocolates for Christmas. I thought it was sweet until I noticed the heart drawn on the back. It's the same box of chocolates I gave him for Christmas. Christmas last year. FML

#6933650
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28626) - you deserved it (2721)

On 12/25/2009 at 2:04am - love - by HeSucks (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my mother got remarried. I am now officially older than my step-father. FML

#13646131
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45461) - you deserved it (2721)

On 10/30/2010 at 2:33am - love - by Stephie2009 - United States

Today, I figured out why my name is Ashley. In order to tell my older sister about getting a new little sister, my parents thought it would be a good idea to make her imaginary friend "Ashley" real. FML

#14244337
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27194) - you deserved it (2721)

On 12/18/2010 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my mom made me teach my delusional gran web browsing. I barely made it to YouTube before she sneered at me, and told me to "stop pissing about before I smash your face in." Two hours and multiple slaps later, she still doesn't get what a URL is, and I fear for my life. FML

#17783230
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23971) - you deserved it (2721)

On 09/19/2011 at 8:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: