Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while volunteering at a local museum, I politely told an elderly gentleman to have a nice day. He responded by yelling "NO" and storming off. Everyone looked at me like I was some sort of monster. FML

#20741264
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39834) - you deserved it (2996)

On 06/22/2013 at 5:16pm - misc - by me - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got married. My grandpa took me aside afterwards and said that the moment the ceremony was over, he heard my wife's vagina slam shut. "Welcome to marriage, sucker," he chuckled, "It's just you and Rosy Palm now!" FML

#21347104
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28565) - you deserved it (2996)

On 01/31/2015 at 12:38am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after complaining to the administration about my roommate, I finally got switched. As I went into the room to meet my new roommate, I found out he was my old roommate's brother. They are exactly the same, and I'm not allowed to switch again. FML

#6649432
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31397) - you deserved it (2995)

On 12/07/2009 at 12:08pm - misc - by mylifesuckssomuch3214 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I walked in on my parents doing it. Luckily they didn't see me so I slipped out. I looked outside, trying to take my mind of the horrors I had just witnessed, only to realize my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. FML

#5065139
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71957) - you deserved it (2995)

On 09/05/2009 at 6:11pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out my grandpa died. As I rushed home crying to comfort my parents, I got pulled over for speeding. The officer told me to cut out the "fake" tears". When I told him my grandpa just died he tacked on another $100 for lying to an officer. Worst. Christmas. Ever. FML

#6926998
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43385) - you deserved it (2995)

On 12/24/2009 at 7:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw a psychiatrist for the first time. After telling her everything I'm going through, she looked at me and said "You know... every five years or so I get a case completely beyond my ability to help." I guess it's been five years. FML

#20963305
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45710) - you deserved it (2995)

On 11/19/2013 at 12:31pm - health - by elle (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was on the subway, when the girl opposite me suddenly started shouting and accusing me of photographing her. I was reading a book on my phone, and I showed her the screen, but I got shoved around anyway by another guy, who threatened to report me for being a pervert. FML

#21082304
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40244) - you deserved it (2995)

On 03/09/2014 at 3:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore

Today, my ex told me she still misses having sex with me. Her next text was "but it's still over." FML

#6211757
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20097) - you deserved it (2994)

On 11/08/2009 at 1:16pm - intimacy - by peacexout108 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got my boyfriend a pair of concert tickets for his birthday. He loved the gift, but turned to me and said "Do I have to bring you?" FML

#37272
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35588) - you deserved it (2994)

On 02/13/2009 at 2:18pm - misc - by sarahhh (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my sister was on television. It would have been great if she weren't being handcuffed for burglary. FML

#12090028
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34030) - you deserved it (2994)

On 07/24/2010 at 7:21pm - love - by ghostyyy - Sent from mobile version

Today, I carpooled with my co-worker whose girlfriend has left him. The radio was playing the song "Jar of Hearts." He then began to sing intensely, and broke down crying. FML

#18244080
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28957) - you deserved it (2994)

On 11/14/2011 at 3:45am - work - by Anon - United States (Nevada)

Today, my mother requested that I return the $500 she had previously given me to help me pay for college. Her reasoning? "You work three jobs, you can afford it." I work three jobs because she decided buying herself a car was more important than my schooling. FML

Today, I was talking to my mom about who I wanted to ask to prom. I told her the names of the girls I was thinking of asking and she replied, "They'll say no, but you can always go with one of your cousins." FML

#252783
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60226) - you deserved it (2993)

On 03/09/2009 at 5:02pm - misc - by Tony (man) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: