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Today, my teacher told us at least 7 different stories about his cat, Jeremy, and how much he eats. And he wonders why we never get anything done in his class. FML

#21097211
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37482) - you deserved it (3396)

On 03/26/2014 at 7:45pm - animals - by alicia75 - United States (Indiana)

Today, my mom went snooping through my art bin to "clean out my old drawings". She found numerous nude pieces and accused me of selling porn. My mom mistook and threw out 57 anatomy practice sketches that I worked very very hard on, and ripped up the remainder of my drawings. FML

#4391923
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54841) - you deserved it (3395)

On 08/08/2009 at 8:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was playing my bass clarinet around the house. I asked my dad if he would be at my concert on December 16th. His response was, "No, I'm working that day." My dad is a plumber, and gets called to work completely at random; he has no schedule. FML

#13693546
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26541) - you deserved it (3395)

On 11/02/2010 at 9:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mother came back from her trip to Vegas. Her breasts were obviously 2 letter sizes larger. I asked if she got a boob job and she denied it, saying that it's against her religion. She's an atheist, and a liar. FML

#20460160
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37557) - you deserved it (3395)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by Brooke - United States (California)

Today, my husband's recent obsession with The Sopranos since James Gandolfini died went a step further into the ridiculous, when he tried to encourage some ducks to land in our swimming pool by throwing loaves of bread into it, while bellowing at them with a 'Noo Joisey' Wise Guy accent. FML

#20770230
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34579) - you deserved it (3395)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:57am - misc - by Not Mrs Soprano (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mom found my dad's hidden stash of cigarettes. He told her they were mine and now I have to spend two hours at therapy for my "smoking problem" every weekend. I've never smoked. FML

#20889651
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50325) - you deserved it (3395)

On 09/21/2013 at 12:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my boss delivered some flowers and a sympathy card signed by everyone in the office to my cubicle. The card said, "Sorry your mom died". My mom isn't dead. I don't know where they got the idea from and no one believes me. They said that denial is part of grieving. FML

#21204205
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47330) - you deserved it (3395)

On 07/09/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by ninnang - United States (Hawaii)

Today, at work, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head on my cash register. A second later, I heard roaring laughter from the security room, followed by someone saying to play it back. I'd almost convinced myself it wasn't about me, when one of the guys came out and gave me a thumb up. FML

#21349710
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35819) - you deserved it (3395)

On 02/04/2015 at 2:28pm - work - by fxck (woman) -

Today, I got to work and saw a new desk had been setup on stilts. 'Oh, who got the standing desk?' I asked. Turns out it's for the guy in the wheelchair who was right behind me. It needs to be high so the controls of his wheelchair can fit under the desk. FML

#21522017
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17862) - you deserved it (3398)

On 02/02/2016 at 5:06am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Cork)

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by showing up at my work and proposing to me. It was sweet until an angry customer bitched us out for "wasting her time." FML

#20141262
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28334) - you deserved it (3394)

On 10/31/2012 at 2:18am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while driving my grandma home from a family dinner, I had to pull into a gas station, because my tank was almost empty. She became convinced that someone would kidnap her while I went to pay, and eventually threatened to blow us up by tossing her lighter at the gas pumps. FML

#20648219
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45544) - you deserved it (3394)

On 05/07/2013 at 6:13pm - misc - by fuckingjesusgran (man) - Bosnia and Herzegovina (Federation of Bosnia and Herzego)

Today, I had a family get-together for my birthday. I got to watch all my family members get piss-drunk and argue over who's having the worst time. FML

#20971273
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40424) - you deserved it (3394)

On 11/26/2013 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I began taking a French language class. After completing and submitting some homework, I got a response. A response that was completely in French. I can't understand shit. FML

#21471290
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20703) - you deserved it (3394)

On 09/22/2015 at 12:31am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)



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