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Today, my ex fiancée, who left me six months ago, asked if I'd mind if she used the wedding dress I bought her for our wedding. She's just gotten engaged again. FML

#15604755
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37248) - you deserved it (3107)

On 04/02/2011 at 12:44pm - love - by Jon (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to work at my job as a secretary. I had been given the task to file my boss's collection of Playboy magazines alphabetically by name of the centerfold. There was one for every month from the years of 1980 until now. FML

#20895973
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35779) - you deserved it (3107)

On 09/25/2013 at 7:22pm - work - by Abcporn (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that I am "un-promotable" to the job that I have been promised for the last two years because, I "don't suffer idiots well." Idiots. FML

Today, I caught my son trying to punch his own teeth out so he'd get more money from the tooth fairy. FML

#21414342
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25887) - you deserved it (3107)

On 05/23/2015 at 7:06am - kids - by DENTALITY (woman) - Norway

Today, I woke up with a bloody nose and my lamp next to me in bed. Apparently I grabbed the cord of the lamp and yanked while I was sleeping, and it fell on my face. The worst part? My boyfriend saw it was going to happen, but didn't stop me because he thought it would be funny to "see my reaction." FML

#6313431
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27156) - you deserved it (3106)

On 11/15/2009 at 2:38pm - misc - by oww - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend picked me up bridal-style to carry me to our bed. As he carried me through the bedroom door, the dog ran between his legs and sent us both crashing to the ground. FML

#18368506
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22427) - you deserved it (3106)

On 11/27/2011 at 5:46pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I accidentally bumped into another car on the road. The worst of the damage was a slight chip to the other driver's paint, but she played it up so much that she ended up being taken away in an ambulance. I'm now terrified that the crazy bitch is going to sue me. FML

#20158993
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27662) - you deserved it (3106)

On 11/11/2012 at 2:11pm - money - by youfuckingslut (man) - United States

Today, a drunken guest in the hotel I work at has barricaded himself in the employee restroom and refuses to come out, unless I "promise to love him forever." It's 4am and I'm the only one here. FML

Today, while out for dinner with my parents, a woman, approximately the same age as my mother, repeatedly propositioned me for sex during the course of my meal. After declining firmly several times, she only stopped after my mother convinced her I was gay. FML

#21279658
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37475) - you deserved it (3106)

On 10/17/2014 at 6:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my Canadian friend is staying a few days at my parents' house. I drove him from the airport, only to find my idiot dad had decked the spare room out with maple syrup bottles. He keeps saying "eh" all the time and asked "What's he so upset aboot?" when my friend was offended. FML

#21316775
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32013) - you deserved it (3106)

On 12/13/2014 at 1:36pm - misc - by ehxtraordinarily pissed (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my father came back from a business trip in Canada. He handed me an "I Love Canada" pen. He brought back an xbox 360 for my younger brother. FML

#70401
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64708) - you deserved it (3105)

On 02/18/2009 at 5:59pm - misc - by lalalee (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was picking up my 10 year old step-son from the airport. He began screaming and crying saying that I wasn't his father. I ended up sitting in a holding room because the security guards thought I was kidnapping him. My wife thought it was hilarious. FML

#5525269
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44872) - you deserved it (3105)

On 09/28/2009 at 11:13am - kids - by justgreat (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, when my mother-in-law told me I was losing weight, my husband started laughing. FML

#18430491
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26632) - you deserved it (3105)

On 12/04/2011 at 8:13pm - love - by brittrod - United States



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