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Today, I went to a family counseling session because my parents are getting a divorce. I told the counselor that I feel guilty because I feel like I caused it. She says that there is no way I could have caused it, that it's my parents' problem when my mom interrupts her to say "Yes she did." FML

#6120985
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44482) - you deserved it (3555)

On 11/02/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by problemchild (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my second roommate in less then a week got a DUI. Both roommates are demanding that I drive them around for free until they get their licenses back, or else they won't have the funds to pay their rent. FML

#16418621
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37215) - you deserved it (3555)

On 05/30/2011 at 2:11pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, while staying at my brother's place for the Christmas holidays, I had to leave because he threatened to "take me outside". Apparently he doesn't like being corrected on whether a certain car has a long wheel base version, so I guess the family Christmas is over. FML

#21005745
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30992) - you deserved it (3555)

On 12/26/2013 at 12:30am - misc - by detour165 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boss requested that I re-organize every file in the office, because she wanted the filing cabinets alphabetized right to left, not left to right. To thank me, she came into my office to give me one uncooked ear of corn. I think my boss has mistaken me for some kind of farm animal. FML

#3613617
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49794) - you deserved it (3554)

On 07/09/2009 at 3:17pm - work - by ST3PH (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was visited by Child Protective Services. Seems someone on my street reported me for neglect because I cloth diaper my children. I moved in less than 6 months ago, so I guess this is how they say, "welcome to the neighborhood" about these parts. FML

#6660369
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34428) - you deserved it (3554)

On 12/08/2009 at 2:02am - kids - by ClothMom (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML

#7264308
187 comments

Today, my boyfriend left for a 2-year job posting in China. We had agreed to maintain a long distance relationship and even worked out a visiting schedule. Later that night, after trying to reach him, I realized the numbers he gave me weren't for China. The country code doesn't even exist. FML

#14871372
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36349) - you deserved it (3554)

On 02/06/2011 at 7:58pm - love - by dumbass -

Today, my husband and I went to my overbearing mom's 57th birthday party. He opened his gift in front of her and said smugly, "The makeup's for your face, and the prayer book's for the fat rolls." Any hope of family peace is now lost. FML

#18414489
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24965) - you deserved it (3554)

On 12/02/2011 at 8:35pm - love - by bad blood, no shit (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend told me to text him when I got home to let him know I'd made it home safe. He said if I didn't, he'd assume that aliens had abducted me and that he'd get a new girlfriend. He was completely serious. FML

#20070673
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21259) - you deserved it (3554)

On 09/13/2012 at 7:38pm - love - by TaffyMichele (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that when one of my toddlers throws up, the other sympathy-pukes too, and that this continues until they're both empty. I guess my car is going to stink of vomit for a while. FML

#21057222
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43707) - you deserved it (3554)

On 02/11/2014 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I sent my long-distance boyfriend a heartfelt message about how much I missed him. He sent me back a picture of a Minion. FML

#21442865
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26868) - you deserved it (3554)

On 07/17/2015 at 3:04am - love - by anon - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I got my medical checkup back. Apparently, I'm diagnosed with a liver condition generally found in alcoholics. I've never drank in my life. FML

#2043570
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61471) - you deserved it (3553)

On 05/18/2009 at 4:48am - health - by esk (man) - China (Shanghai)

Today, after I moved into my college dorm three days ago, my roommate is still convinced that she is a cat. FML

#16099079
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30557) - you deserved it (3553)

On 05/08/2011 at 11:22pm - animals - by SMCHR (woman) - Ireland



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