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Today, I found out that when my girlfriend said she gave up sex for lent, it was just with me and not my brother. FML

#19343817
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35941) - you deserved it (2342)

On 03/25/2012 at 9:11am - intimacy - by ohno - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had a dream I was on the toilet taking the longest piss known to man. Unfortunately, it was partially true. FML

Today, I found out my ex got invited to our Christmas Party. I also found out that she got much more presents and money from my family than I did. FML

#6934422
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24402) - you deserved it (2341)

On 12/25/2009 at 3:14am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was called gorgeous for the first time in 4 years. By a robot. A female robot. Who was trying to sell me cosmetics. FML

#9015781
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18974) - you deserved it (2341)

On 03/12/2010 at 1:36am - misc - by gorgeousgirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I received a serious concussion and several stitches to the back of my head. The attacker? My mom. FML

#17817623
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23676) - you deserved it (2341)

On 09/24/2011 at 12:40am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, as I was driving to work, I glanced in my rear view mirror to see an old man behind me using binoculars to see in front of him since we were stuck in a huge traffic jam. He rear ended me. FML

#16451078
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25351) - you deserved it (2341)

On 06/01/2011 at 12:43pm - misc - by trafficfail (woman) -

Today, I finally got up the nerve to invite the guy I like to hang out at my house. It was also the day my mother decided that our house is a "pants optional zone," and that she should implement that policy immediately. While he was at our house. FML

#14802343
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22676) - you deserved it (2340)

On 02/01/2011 at 9:01pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was on the bus, it hit a bump on the road and made me hit a elderly man. The bus driver thought I did it on purpose and made me get off. FML

#15147269
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21843) - you deserved it (2340)

On 02/28/2011 at 1:00am - misc - by Parade (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my car broke down in the middle of the street. Lucky for me, two guys helped me push my car to the side of the road. Right when I was about to thank them, they stole my purse. FML

#18020757
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26149) - you deserved it (2340)

On 10/19/2011 at 1:01am - misc - by mommydearist - United States (Texas)

Today, it was my birthday. Normally, the little office I work in throws a big party for every employee on their special day, but nothing was done for me, not even a "Happy Birthday" came my way. I didn't want to be rude, so I stayed silent. They didn't do anything because I was getting laid off. FML

#3298219
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55279) - you deserved it (2339)

On 06/28/2009 at 4:25am - work - by WitchQueenLiz (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my twin sister sent a nude picture to her boyfriend, who then forwarded it on to everyone else. Everyone else thinks it's me. FML

#13729352
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29982) - you deserved it (2339)

On 11/05/2010 at 7:17pm - intimacy - by jsquared - United States (California)

Today, while riding the bus, a creepy guy gave me the "rape glare" and another guy repeated every word to the conversation I was having with my friend under his breath. FML

#17597780
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24335) - you deserved it (2339)

On 08/27/2011 at 7:06pm - misc - by Revalation - United States

Today, I was at Target deciding what chap-stick to get when an old lady violently hit me with her umbrella and kept yelling at me saying, "You are too young for this! Think twice!" FML

#17525385
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26372) - you deserved it (2339)

On 08/20/2011 at 12:44am - misc - by anonymous22kittylicklick (woman) - United States (New York)



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