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Tuesday 18 March 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my mother taught my 98-year-old great-uncle to knock on the wall if he needs us. He can't remember who we are; but every hour he can remember to knock to ask, "Is it breakfast yet?" FML

#21089766
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36799) - you deserved it (3799)

On 03/18/2014 at 4:36am - misc - by can't sleep - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was babysitting my nephew and we decided to color together. He drew a picture of someone who looked dead, almost zombie-like, while everyone else looked pretty normal. When I asked who it was, he said in a serious, scary voice, "It's you." FML

#21088838
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36592) - you deserved it (3782)

On 03/17/2014 at 5:51am - kids - by BondingTime - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out my ex just got engaged to a girl he met 3 months ago, shortly before he ended our 5 year relationship. His reason for breaking up was that he didn't believe in marriage and couldn't be with someone who wanted to get married. Right. FML

#21089901
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44841) - you deserved it (3737)

On 03/18/2014 at 10:56am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Japan

Today, a coworker filed a complaint against me, all because I ate a banana at lunch, which he claimed is "threateningly sexual", whatever the hell that means. FML

#21090158
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42085) - you deserved it (3720)

On 03/18/2014 at 5:31pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got to spend 4 hours on a bus with a group of selfie-taking teenagers who spent the majority of the time trying to harmonize while singing various songs. I'm pretty sure half of them were tone deaf. FML

#21092926
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36576) - you deserved it (3691)

On 03/21/2014 at 7:59pm - misc - by please stop singing!!!! - United States (Florida)

Today, I met my future mother-in-law. All went well; she complimented my dress, and I complimented her haircut. Then she and her son had a screaming match over how our children will be fat because of their mother. FML

#21093159
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39356) - you deserved it (3554)

On 03/22/2014 at 12:49am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my roommate's extremely loud and obnoxious alarm went off six times, waking me up each time, before she finally gave up on hitting the snooze button and went back to sleep for good. FML

#21089097
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35171) - you deserved it (3552)

On 03/17/2014 at 3:07pm - misc - by IMAWAKE - United States (Michigan)

Today, my dad yelled at me for being irresponsible while he watched me fold his laundry. FML

#21094619
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36788) - you deserved it (3515)

On 03/23/2014 at 8:44pm - misc - by hannahg - United States (Michigan)

Today, a crazy woman grabbed my hair and mentioned how lovely it was. She then asked when I would donate it. I told her I didn't want to, at which point she started yelling that she was going to get some scissors and cut it all off to teach me a lesson. FML

#21090883
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44027) - you deserved it (3508)

On 03/19/2014 at 2:14pm - misc - by donttouchmyhair (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was treating a patient at the hospital where I'm a dentist. This particular gentleman was old and slightly deaf. After completing the procedure I gestured to the spitoon and asked him to spit. He got up, steadied himself, and spat straight in my face. FML

#21093322
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37658) - you deserved it (3481)

On 03/22/2014 at 7:56am - work - by Dr.Anonymous (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, the feedback my teacher wrote on my English assignment was so horrible that it took me half an hour and help from both my parents to decipher it. It turned out to be a scathing criticism of my "poor communication skills". I hate my teachers. FML

#21096093
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35620) - you deserved it (3466)

On 03/25/2014 at 2:42pm - misc - by fluent in two, unlike you (man) - Mexico

Today, I was sitting on a bench outside a supermarket waiting to be picked up, when a old lady walked out of the shop. She hadn't noticed me and sat on the bench beside me. She looked around and saw me, rolled her eyes, got up and moved to a different bench. FML

#21090670
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35241) - you deserved it (3460)

On 03/19/2014 at 6:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while lifeguarding, a kid thought it'd be hilarious to take a crap in the pool. The other kids freaked out and rushed to get out. Several of them slipped on the way out and hurt themselves fairly badly. Two parents are now threatening to sue us, and my boss blames me. FML

#21096273
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41643) - you deserved it (3448)

On 03/25/2014 at 5:53pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)



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