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Sunday 23 February 2014

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Today, my store manager thought that it would improve morale to talk in hashtags. FML

by Lori_ftw / 02/26/2014 at 10:28pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I left for work. Halfway to my car, my neighbour's son jumped out and emptied a bucket of water all over me. The little pissant screamed with laughter and ran back to his house. His mum's reaction was essentially "kids will be kids" and slamming the door on me. FML

by HeMayHaveSomeIssues / 02/28/2014 at 3:01pm / Denmark / Kids

Today, I arrived at the airport only to find my suitcase was lost and my 3 weeks worth of clothes and supplies gone. All I had left was my wallet and carry ons. Upon leaving the airport I was mugged. FML

by seriously though / 02/22/2014 at 12:48am / United States (Colorado) / Transportation

Today, I had to proofread a document my boss had written. When I pointed out that he spelled "college" as "collage" multiple times, he angrily accused me of trying to make him look stupid. This is the guy who constantly boasts about his "genius" IQ level to the whole office. FML

by cunting cuntface of a boss / 02/25/2014 at 3:42pm / Australia / Work

Today, after 10 months of hard work, it was the opening night of the show I was directing. Everybody loved it, except my mother. She called it the worst thing she'd ever seen. Thanks for the support, mum. FML

by Disappointed / 02/19/2014 at 4:33pm / United Kingdom (Brighton and Hove) / Work

Today, I was doing a science presentation about glucose. There was around 20 judges at the event who could've judged me, but instead I got judged by the only person in the whole entire world who doesn't know what glucose is and doesn't think it exists. FML

by anonymous / 02/20/2014 at 12:27am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, the parent of a student called to ask me about a homework assignment. At the end of the call, she told me that I seem to be losing my "Asian accent" from when she first talked to me in the summer. I was born in the US, grew up in NJ and speak perfect English. FML

by kdubz23 / 02/17/2014 at 5:41pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I was let go from work because they need "younger people". I'm 19 and I work at a flower market. FML

by Anonymous / 02/21/2014 at 2:02am / Work

Today, I was walking a dog at the animal hospital where I work when it pooped out a rag-like object. I told the doctor, who told me to clean it off to see what it was. It was a rainbow-colored thong. We have to give it back to the owner when they pick their dog up. FML

by crap / 02/23/2014 at 11:01pm / United States (Nevada) / Animals

Today, my car was found with a smashed window and a torn-apart steering column, in order to hot-wire it. The thief didn't get away with my car, though. The engine was in the garage, where I've been working on it for two days. FML