Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Sunday 23 February 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went on a blind date. At the end of the night, I told him I had a surprisingly great time. He replied, "Yeah, that was fun. You're really funny and smart. If you were pretty, I'd totally go out with you again." FML

#21064082
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54550) - you deserved it (4856)

On 02/18/2014 at 12:45am - love - by fiercehawk (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my school received the ranking for state tournaments. We're last. Our cheerleaders are too embarrassed to cheer for us. FML

Today, I watched my brother attempt to cook some eggs without turning the gas on. FML

#21066280
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38877) - you deserved it (4746)

On 02/20/2014 at 5:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I went to the arcade with my dad, and we decided to try out the hurricane simulator, which blasts 60mph air around in an enclosed space. My dad farted halfway through. FML

#21066497
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43895) - you deserved it (4705)

On 02/20/2014 at 12:45pm - misc - by begging for air - United States (Oregon)

Today, after 3 weeks of hard work, I finally finished painting my room. Apparently my 6-year-old brother thought I wasn't done and that he should help me out. I now have little red handprints all over my white walls. FML

#21063710
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35800) - you deserved it (4700)

On 02/17/2014 at 8:01pm - kids - by LittleArtist - United States (Alabama)

Today, with a single misstep, I managed to send myself and several others tumbling down a stairwell at work. An ambulance ended up having to be called for one lady. FML

#21067848
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38010) - you deserved it (4632)

On 02/21/2014 at 7:20pm - work - by ashamedklutz (man) - United Kingdom (Fife)

Today, on Facebook, someone wrote a status implying that she was going to kill herself. I called a mutual friend, asking to check up on her. The next status the girl puts up said, "Someone thought I was going to commit suicide! Haha what a loser!" FML

#21071970
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50230) - you deserved it (4628)

On 02/26/2014 at 4:31am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, as I tried to get out of bed, I got my foot tangled in my sheets. I reached out to my dresser to avoid falling flat on my face. I didn't fall, but I did manage to smash my fingers in the drawer while still trapped in the sheets. FML

#21072281
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38043) - you deserved it (4561)

On 02/26/2014 at 3:55pm - misc - by IVOaf (woman) - United States

Today, I ran into my favorite teacher from high school, the one that really inspired me to become one myself. I told her that I'm in my last year of college preparing to become a teacher, to which she replied, "Wow, they really are letting anyone have a crack at being a teacher these days." FML

#21067542
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43528) - you deserved it (4549)

On 02/21/2014 at 11:32am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my cat pissed all over my work clothes. They weren't even on the floor, she knocked the hanger down just so she could use them as a toilet. FML

#21073377
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36107) - you deserved it (4438)

On 02/27/2014 at 5:42pm - animals - by baxeh - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my pregnant wife's parents called me at work, saying she'd been crying inconsolably and wouldn't say what was wrong. After pleading with my boss, I rushed home. Turns out there was an "ugly" sofa in a TV ad and she felt it was "picking on ugly sofas". FML

#21070396
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45865) - you deserved it (4328)

On 02/24/2014 at 2:36pm - misc - by fuckmeitsgettingworse - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, a guy from work that I barely know gave me sunflowers for my birthday. He told me, "You mentioned they were your favorite." I mentioned it to my family at home a few days ago. FML

#21069947
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47488) - you deserved it (4254)

On 02/23/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by You Are My Sunshine (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that I'm the only person in my family that our new cat likes. She sleeps on my bed and always sits in my lap and despises everyone else. I'm allergic to cats. FML

#21070365
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44089) - you deserved it (4220)

On 02/24/2014 at 2:05pm - animals - by Good choice cat (woman) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: