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Wednesday 5 February 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, a woman pushed a stroller in front of my car. Thinking I'd hit someone, I jumped out. Turns out it was a doll. The "woman" was a 14-year-old girl, claiming, "I did it for the Vine!" FML

#21058421
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50183) - you deserved it (3954)

On 02/12/2014 at 7:52pm - misc - by Parusu - United States (Florida)

Today, my mother-in-law tried to "accidentally" run me over. FML

#21052599
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44674) - you deserved it (3941)

On 02/06/2014 at 6:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after years of insomnia and going to doctors to help get a regular sleeping pattern, I finally fell asleep without the help of medication, only to dream about being chased by an angry seal and singing to Rihanna with a horse. This is probably why I don't sleep. FML

#21049132
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41970) - you deserved it (3880)

On 02/03/2014 at 8:29am - health - by Sleepless (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, a robin flew into my window and died. My mom, being a biology teacher, thought it would be a great experience for my brother and me to dissect it on the kitchen table. She threatened to ground us if we didn't do it. FML

#21054692
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43031) - you deserved it (3868)

On 02/08/2014 at 6:24pm - animals - by sciencesadness (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, after my car being in the shop for over a day and with no updates from the dealership, I decided to pay them a visit. The place was almost empty, and they hadn't done any work on my car. But judging by the used condom on my back seat, somebody got their own oil checked. FML

#21053684
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44096) - you deserved it (3832)

On 02/07/2014 at 7:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I told my professor that I'll be missing class next week due to upcoming surgery. I asked if I could take the exam that I'd otherwise miss another day. He said no, and that I'd just have to take a failing grade, then wished me luck with the surgery. FML

#21053454
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51070) - you deserved it (3795)

On 02/07/2014 at 3:30pm - health - by ... - United States (Illinois)

Today, like every day, I had to walk to my bus stop. The only difference today is there was snow and ice over everything. Not only did I slip and fall, soaking both myself and the contents of my bag, the bus driver saw me there at the bus stop and drove straight past. FML

#21051124
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43410) - you deserved it (3672)

On 02/05/2014 at 9:07am - misc - by no snow day (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found a Google search for "erectile dysfunction" in my browser search history, along with pages about treatments for it. I'm a woman, and I live alone. FML

#21049445
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45189) - you deserved it (3427)

On 02/03/2014 at 4:16pm - misc - by jai90 (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

#21053382
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42069) - you deserved it (3422)

On 02/07/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Mayotte

Today, a kid in class kept chatting to his friend, and was made to swap seats. Every time the guy he swapped with moved, the stench from his armpits wafted over. It smelled like nacho cheese crossed with ball sweat. It got so bad that I eventually had to go dry heave in the toilets. FML

#21050316
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38043) - you deserved it (3339)

On 02/04/2014 at 1:55pm - health - by even axe would smell better (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, a guy drove straight into an intersection, running a stop sign and narrowly missing my car. I had to swerve into a snow bank to avoid him. He stopped long enough to see that I had a toddler in my car, before flipping me off and driving away. FML

#21058102
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44318) - you deserved it (3316)

On 02/12/2014 at 1:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I discovered that when one of my toddlers throws up, the other sympathy-pukes too, and that this continues until they're both empty. I guess my car is going to stink of vomit for a while. FML

#21057222
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40507) - you deserved it (3243)

On 02/11/2014 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)



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