Choose the period

Friday 8 November 2013

Choose a category

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents, despite my long-standing protests. Over the next hour, they asked her if she'd ever considered becoming a swinger, why not, if she'd ever consider it in future, and to keep them in mind if she does. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2013 at 7:10pm / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, while refereeing a soccer game, I was accused of being racist, blind, and a fascist by spectators. The game was played by a group of third graders. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2013 at 12:21pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I was accused of stealing when I dropped a $20 bill in front of my boss. His logic: I'm too poor to have a $20 bill and there's no way it was a tip, since our customers are "so stingy". It was a tip and it was going to get me through the rest of the month. He won't give it back. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2013 at 2:18am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I was taking out a customer's groceries when he offered me a $5 tip. I told him I couldn't accept, since it's against store policy, but thanked him anyway. He called me an asshole just as my boss was walking to his car, who then yelled at me for it. FML

by BagBoy / 11/13/2013 at 1:42am / United States / Work

Today, the package I've waited for months for finally arrived. It turned out it wasn't for me, but for my sister, who bought the same thing only 2 weeks ago. When I called, the company told me they received my payment, but that there were no more of the item in stock. FML

by GDubeau24 / 11/05/2013 at 12:34pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend's ex moved into the apartment beneath us. She's already called the cops on us for a noise complaint twice. We were sleeping. It's going to be a long year. FML

by Anonymous / 11/12/2013 at 2:12pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, a woman accused me of bullying her son, and said that she is going to get me fired. Her son is a 27-year-old teacher at my school, whom I disciplined for showing up drunk. FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2013 at 8:46pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, a drunken customer blindsided me after I told him I would not be giving him a free drink after I watched him put his own hair in it. FML

by ShakenNotStirred / 11/11/2013 at 3:18am / Australia (Queensland) / Work