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Monday 7 October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was cuddling my new boyfriend, when he went in to kiss me for the first time. Sadly, I reflexively kneed him in the balls. FML

#20917814
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37813) - you deserved it (11575)

On 10/12/2013 at 4:28pm - love - by fuck.jpg.bmp.gif.rar.zip.shit (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, in revenge for me pulling the old salt-in-the-soda prank on him, my dad showed up at my college dressed in a tight blouse and miniskirt, demanding that I come home early with him. I think I'm going to be lynched next time I go to class. FML

#20919140
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34215) - you deserved it (11125)

On 10/13/2013 at 5:20pm - misc - by HSampsON (man) - Niger (Niamey)

Today, I jokingly told my friend that I was the kid who stole his brand new glow-in-the-dark markers back in kindergarten. Now he's ignoring my texts and calls and says we're through. So much for our twelve years of friendship. FML

#20918380
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38335) - you deserved it (9419)

On 10/13/2013 at 12:33am - misc - by markerThief (man) - United States (California)

Today, after almost 2 days, I finally fell asleep, during my husband's vows, on our wedding day, in front of 250 guests. FML

#20917263
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42669) - you deserved it (9407)

On 10/12/2013 at 3:23am - love - by angryinlaws (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, feeling bored and lonely, I drove into town to wander around the shops and go to Subway for lunch. While there, I picked up two trays and put one on the opposite side of the table, along with some of my rubbish, to make it look like I was with someone. FML

#20916326
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31157) - you deserved it (8752)

On 10/11/2013 at 11:18am - misc - by FriutlessApple (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I got so self-conscious about weight gain that I got paranoid about how much my Castle Crashers character was eating to heal. FML

Today, my boyfriend blew me off yet again because he claims he has a responsibility as a "crew leader" to train and recruit members at all times, to accommodate all time zones. GTA V is ruining our relationship. FML

Today, I got my daughter's school pictures. Instead of smiling, she did the duck face. She's 6. FML

#20912722
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43102) - you deserved it (6976)

On 10/08/2013 at 5:16pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to shove me over; I faceplanted. I was going to say "F*ck you" and "I will kill you". It came out as "I will f*ck you." He's still laughing. FML

#20910543
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40809) - you deserved it (6796)

On 10/07/2013 at 2:11am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, I realized I can't afford to break up with my boyfriend of 2 years, as we split the rent. I'll need a second job just to get out of my bad relationship. FML

Today, I again failed to convince my girlfriend that the $100 in our account is the minimum amount we have keep there to avoid being charged by the bank. We have a joint checking account, and the only way to take her off it is to close the account outright. FML

Today, my brother finally informed me that our shower head has an option to make the water only come out of the detachable part. My left leg's been in a cast for 4 months, and the whole time I've had to shower sitting backwards with my leg sticking out the door. He knew. FML

Today, my financial troubles got so bad, I contemplated visiting a friend simply so I could swipe their deodorant. FML

#20912330
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37564) - you deserved it (5969)

On 10/08/2013 at 10:34am - money - by moneymoneymoney (woman) - United States (Florida)



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