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Saturday 14 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was struggling to move a large bookshelf downstairs. Mid-way down, the weight became too much for me and I desperately yelled to my dad for help. He stood at the top of the stairs and said, "Cash or broken bones. How much's it worth, son?" I'm now £50 poorer. FML

#20889249
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41366) - you deserved it (3886)

On 09/20/2013 at 6:20pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, my girlfriend came over to visit me and my brother at our apartment. I left for just five minutes to fix us lunch. When I got back, she was making out with my brother. FML

#20889155
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51811) - you deserved it (3861)

On 09/20/2013 at 5:00pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Hungary (Szeged)

Today, a street preacher got on my metro car and gave a long, loud speech about how we sinful, polluted congressional staffers must inform our bosses that choosing a homosexual lifestyle was like trading your soul for soup. We got stuck in a tunnel for thirty minutes. FML

#20887597
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39459) - you deserved it (3826)

On 09/19/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by CapitolSouthSux (woman) - United States

Today, I was uninvited to a bachelorette party. I wouldn't really care, if the party hadn't been for me, ahead of my wedding tomorrow. FML

#20885218
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48118) - you deserved it (3810)

On 09/17/2013 at 1:52pm - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while sorting through my clothes, I found one of my ex's old sweaters. After a lot of thought and difficulty, I threw it out. I felt empowered, until my father later rifled through my trash and claimed the sweater for himself. FML

#20890169
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41865) - you deserved it (3790)

On 09/21/2013 at 1:28pm - love - by gemtas5 (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I shaved my face after several months of growth. This would be OK if my 4-year-old daughter would still talk to me. Apparently she doesn't recognise me, and I'm scary. FML

#20887990
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44535) - you deserved it (3786)

On 09/19/2013 at 5:18pm - kids - by Smoothskin (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I learned that my parrots now can shit horizontally when I found the wall next to the cage covered in feces. FML

Today, my two closest friends declared that they hated each other. They're my bridesmaids. The wedding is in three weeks. FML

#20878136
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46172) - you deserved it (3725)

On 09/12/2013 at 8:39am - misc - by SadFace (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was at a coffee shop, when a middle-aged guy called me a "two-timing whore", dumped his coffee on me and walked out in tears. I'm 14 and I have no idea who he was. FML

#20878614
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60101) - you deserved it (3721)

On 09/12/2013 at 6:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I bought $250 worth of groceries and was feeling rather good about myself because it's the first time I've been able to do so in months. When I returned home I found my fridge/freezer broken. Most of the food I bought was dairy or frozen. FML

#20875436
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49358) - you deserved it (3646)

On 09/10/2013 at 3:35am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend invited me over for the first time. I pulled up to her house just to be denied at the front door by her mum. She'd invited me over to break up with me, but had her mum do it for her. FML

#20876765
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56244) - you deserved it (3612)

On 09/11/2013 at 5:30am - love - by AnonymousLoser (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my 16-year-old cousin came to visit for the week. So far, she's said "raunchy", "cray-cray", "legit", and "like" an uncountable number of times. She's only been here for a half hour. FML

#20881272
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43122) - you deserved it (3585)

On 09/14/2013 at 5:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out I do not have a fast metabolism, I've actually had a tape worm living inside me for 3 years. FML

#20875969
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60520) - you deserved it (3559)

On 09/10/2013 at 5:41pm - health - by Iskylite (man) - United States (Texas)



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