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Saturday 14 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, even after loving him unconditionally, my originally 340 pound morbidly obese husband, who within the past two years lost almost 200 pounds, left me because now, he "can do so much better". FML

#20874079
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76242) - you deserved it (4373)

On 09/09/2013 at 3:19am - love - by heartbroken - United States (California)

Today, I was complimented by a stranger, who said I looked great in my outfit. I thanked her, and she immediately gave me a fist-bump. I stared curiously, and she explained: she was arguing with her friends about whether I'm a man or a woman. The pitch of my voice was the answer. FML

#20881965
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46725) - you deserved it (4348)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I caught my roommate trying to use my flashlight as a dildo. FML

#20889160
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52411) - you deserved it (4328)

On 09/20/2013 at 5:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She later put on Facebook that, "Today was a great day!" FML

#20878650
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47633) - you deserved it (4309)

On 09/12/2013 at 7:08pm - love - by WTF - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

#20876988
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53335) - you deserved it (4283)

On 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm - animals - by ugh Buck! (woman) - United States

Today, in French class we had to write love letters as an exercise. Since my boyfriend recently broke up with me by text message, I ended up writing a 20-sentence love letter in French to my cat. FML

#20878541
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45969) - you deserved it (4176)

On 09/12/2013 at 5:24pm - love - by Frenchie - United States (Illinois)

Today, I met my birth mother. My dad won't talk to me, my mom won't stop crying and thinks I'm replacing her, and the rest of my family won't stop calling me a bitch. I'm 21, and I just wanted to meet the woman who pushed me head-first out of her vagina. FML

Today, I walked in the bathroom to find my son cleaning his penis. It wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't cleaning it with a toothbrush. FML

#20883448
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45556) - you deserved it (4145)

On 09/16/2013 at 3:51am - kids - by clean - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my English teacher handed back my creative story assignment with a 74% on it. Apparently, she docked 10% because I had an unrealistic, overly dramatic plot line. That plot line was based on my life. FML

#20887417
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46542) - you deserved it (4128)

On 09/19/2013 at 2:15am - work - by Sua - Canada (Alberta)

Today, it's my birthday. I don't mind crappy gifts, but I have to wonder why the hell my boyfriend bought me a home enema kit. FML

#20890231
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41511) - you deserved it (4028)

On 09/21/2013 at 2:10pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my sister, who knows I'm severely afraid of heights, got me tickets to sky dive for my birthday. When I reminded her of my fear, she stated that she forgot and should just keep them for herself and her boyfriend. My mom agreed. FML

#20875635
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48384) - you deserved it (3985)

On 09/10/2013 at 10:56am - money - by PartTimePrincess (woman) - United States

Today, my partner walked in the room wearing a sweater from my wardrobe, making jokes about it and saying how ugly it was. That sweater was the last thing my father wore before he passed away. FML

Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. After assessing the loss, I saw a taunting note on the fridge saying, "Locks work best when the door's SHUT." My housekeeper had apparently left the door wide open. FML

#20885188
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46902) - you deserved it (3905)

On 09/17/2013 at 1:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)



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