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Saturday 14 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, a man walked into the bank I work at and asked what he would need in order to open an account. I had to look him in the eyes with a straight face, say, "Two pieces of identification," and ask him to put some pants on. FML

#20880767
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39064) - you deserved it (2824)

On 09/14/2013 at 11:04am - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, the guy on the floor above me decided it was time for a tuba jam session. Apparently optimal tuba time is 2am. FML

#20881873
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41268) - you deserved it (2789)

On 09/15/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by sleeplessinrichmond - United States (New York)

Today, while riding the bus, the person next to me broke into a coughing fit. Fortunately, he covered his mouth. Unfortunately, he used my arm. FML

#20889355
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40108) - you deserved it (2720)

On 09/20/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by -.- - United States (California)

Today, it was my first day closing alone at a pet store when a lady came in wanting to return a bird she bought months ago. Once I informed her there were no returns on livestock, she let the bird free and ran out the door, leaving me to catch it and explain to my manager where it came from. FML

#20885115
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43031) - you deserved it (2677)

On 09/17/2013 at 11:44am - work - by tay - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boss took me to one side and said, "Cross me like that ever again, and you're fired." I have no clue what he was talking about, and he denies ever having said a word to me. FML

#20882475
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39201) - you deserved it (2644)

On 09/15/2013 at 2:47pm - work - by what... (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to explain to my grandfather that Canadians aren't evil by reminding him that he's Canadian. FML

#20885056
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38795) - you deserved it (2642)

On 09/17/2013 at 10:21am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, one of my employees called in after his 8-hour shift, explaining that he had bed bugs at home, found one on his shirt, and thinks they are in the store. I own a mattress shop. They'd spread. FML

#20877588
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47760) - you deserved it (2635)

On 09/11/2013 at 9:12pm - work - by icanteven - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my colleagues and I found out that our boss has been taking business advice from an astrologer as well as a soothsayer. FML

#20886196
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34408) - you deserved it (2599)

On 09/18/2013 at 2:34am - work - by CrystalsDontWork - United States (Texas)

Today, a co-worker described, in vivid detail in the middle of the office, how he dribbles after peeing, and often has a burning sensation. FML

Today, I noticed that my new colleague never laughs. Instead she says, "LOL". I have to work with her every day. FML

#20884887
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38432) - you deserved it (2594)

On 09/17/2013 at 4:26am - work - by Jienaf (man) - Malta

Today, a lady stormed into the pharmacy I work at and chewed me out because the medicine I sold her the day before gave her horrible diarrhea as a "side effect". I checked, and it was the medicine she asked for - laxatives. FML

#20883379
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46515) - you deserved it (2450)

On 09/16/2013 at 1:35am - health - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out my grandma wears dentures when I had to fish them out of a cooler. She lost them bobbing for beer at a local bar. FML

#20875421
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35737) - you deserved it (2428)

On 09/10/2013 at 3:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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