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Wednesday 4 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my sister, who knows I'm severely afraid of heights, got me tickets to sky dive for my birthday. When I reminded her of my fear, she stated that she forgot and should just keep them for herself and her boyfriend. My mom agreed. FML

#20875635
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44748) - you deserved it (3633)

On 09/10/2013 at 10:56am - money - by PartTimePrincess (woman) - United States

Today, my friend asked if she could come over to my place. Since it's my birthday tomorrow, I said sure. Turns out she just wants to copy all my notes for our upcoming exam. FML

#20871829
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39868) - you deserved it (3535)

On 09/07/2013 at 6:22pm - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a customer kept harassing me and threatening to sue me for all I'm worth because I wouldn't give her a free refill. Her reasoning was that it's "illegal" to deny people a free refill if there's still a little drink left in the cup. FML

#20871774
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45331) - you deserved it (3524)

On 09/07/2013 at 5:43pm - work - by goshoveafuckingfrappuccinoupyourvagyoupsychocunt (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while working at Subway, I was about to take a guy's order. He quickly held up a hand and asked for someone else to make his sub, because he doesn't like "ugly people" touching his food. FML

#20871412
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52405) - you deserved it (3503)

On 09/07/2013 at 12:59pm - work - by /(•'_'•)\ (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I learned that my parrots now can shit horizontally when I found the wall next to the cage covered in feces. FML

Today, my company is doing so bad that I had to take down my symbolic first dollar so that I could buy a roll of crackers for dinner. FML

#20865414
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45652) - you deserved it (3472)

On 09/02/2013 at 11:03pm - work - by smurftastic (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend invited me over for the first time. I pulled up to her house just to be denied at the front door by her mum. She'd invited me over to break up with me, but had her mum do it for her. FML

#20876765
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54061) - you deserved it (3437)

On 09/11/2013 at 5:30am - love - by AnonymousLoser (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I had to bail my brother out of jail after he punched a convenience store clerk in the face for running out of Cheetos. FML

#20867149
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40076) - you deserved it (3411)

On 09/04/2013 at 3:00am - kids - by ven980 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my car broke down. My dad insisted he could fix it, but screwed up in the process. After finally getting the car towed to a mechanic, I was told that I'd only needed a new water pump, but thanks to the damage my dad did, fixing it all will cost me a small fortune. FML

#20870135
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39618) - you deserved it (3387)

On 09/06/2013 at 12:10pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I bought $250 worth of groceries and was feeling rather good about myself because it's the first time I've been able to do so in months. When I returned home I found my fridge/freezer broken. Most of the food I bought was dairy or frozen. FML

#20875436
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45739) - you deserved it (3308)

On 09/10/2013 at 3:35am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out I do not have a fast metabolism, I've actually had a tape worm living inside me for 3 years. FML

#20875969
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56403) - you deserved it (3260)

On 09/10/2013 at 5:41pm - health - by Iskylite (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my sister-in-law pooped with the bathroom door open until my husband had to tell her to close it, then she came out with unwashed hands and started rooting through the cookies. This isn't even the most unhygienic thing she's done today. FML

#20871127
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50194) - you deserved it (3236)

On 09/07/2013 at 7:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, who has frequent night terrors, also sleepwalks. And apparently sleep-pisses on the bathroom rug. FML

#20872688
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42216) - you deserved it (3230)

On 09/08/2013 at 9:07am - love - by laundry day again... - United States



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