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Wednesday 4 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I put scribbles, lines, shapes and random words on my calendar just to make it seem like I was busy. This isn't the first time. FML

#20867690
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26589) - you deserved it (7088)

On 09/04/2013 at 5:07pm - misc - by cherbear1000 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I officially became a divorced marriage counselor. FML

#20877295
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42833) - you deserved it (6992)

On 09/11/2013 at 5:35pm - work - by natattack - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that I have a rack and butt most girls would be jealous of. That wouldn't be bad if I wasn't a dude. FML

Today, I went to college, where I'm studying for my dream job. Despite getting up at 5am to catch the earliest bus into town, I arrived ten minutes late. My professor knows my circumstances, but is still threatening to kick me off the course if I don't "arrive on time like everyone else." FML

#20869057
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36334) - you deserved it (6748)

On 09/05/2013 at 4:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I spent a large portion of the afternoon playing hide and seek with the door-to-door salesman who saw me sneak in the back door and won't stop knocking. No amount of hiding behind the couch will make him go away. FML

#20867080
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34425) - you deserved it (6481)

On 09/04/2013 at 1:25am - misc - by my back hurts - Australia (South Australia)

Today, after months of patiently waiting, I finally got my roommates out of the house for the night so I could have sex with my boyfriend for the first time without being interrupted. He couldn't get it up. FML

#20864109
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49632) - you deserved it (6299)

On 09/02/2013 at 2:49am - intimacy - by Kiddo (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I received an email from my professor asking me not to jump ahead on assignments as it makes the other students look bad. FML

#20864021
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39234) - you deserved it (6247)

On 09/02/2013 at 1:14am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my loneliness reached a new level when I befriended the fly in my apartment, Mr. Stickyfoot. FML

#20866691
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33694) - you deserved it (6131)

On 09/03/2013 at 9:32pm - misc - by JustAnotherFML23 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was asked to dumb myself down so the people I was training could comprehend what I was saying. FML

#20868484
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33931) - you deserved it (6070)

On 09/05/2013 at 2:57am - work - by Retarded (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, when my husband asked me what the password to my new computer is, I told him it was the month and year of our marriage. He couldn't figure out the password. FML

#20872459
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41146) - you deserved it (6042)

On 09/08/2013 at 1:42am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, my entire gym class had to run the 1600 with our coach calling out finishing times. My finishing time was reported as "3 days short of a year." FML

#20867471
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36384) - you deserved it (6029)

On 09/04/2013 at 1:28pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I had a dream in which I was playing tennis. As I hit a powerful serve, I suddenly woke up due to having slapped myself in the face. FML

#20875790
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40756) - you deserved it (6020)

On 09/10/2013 at 2:44pm - misc - by Grand Slam (man) - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)

Today, I found out that my obese son, who is on a health-mandated diet and exercise plan, gorges on junk food whenever he has the chance. His logic? "It won't make you fatter if you crap it out." FML

#20863945
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38731) - you deserved it (5902)

On 09/02/2013 at 12:16am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)



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