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Wednesday 28 August 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I couldn't sleep due to an awful head cold, so I stayed home from work. Apparently, the local high school marching band practices in the park across the street at 9am. They're doing the Imperial March music from Star Wars. They suck. FML

#20867437
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42268) - you deserved it (3320)

On 09/04/2013 at 12:24pm - misc - by lostinspace (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after a long couple of months working non-stop, I finally got someone to cover my shift. Turns out she was joking, and when I didn't show up for work, I had been fired. FML

#20859399
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42888) - you deserved it (3319)

On 08/29/2013 at 3:33pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, after I explained to my waitress that I have an allergy to butter, she nonetheless put some on my baked potato. When I had her get me another, without butter, she came back with one and then asked if I would like butter with it. FML

#20862628
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47106) - you deserved it (3317)

On 09/01/2013 at 12:40am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out after spending my life's income on paying for my grandma's cancer treatment that she has been faking it. FML

#20859354
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56435) - you deserved it (3311)

On 08/29/2013 at 2:48pm - health - by scammed (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a customer wanted a military discount for buying two 39 cent Slim Jims. I work at an auto parts store. FML

#20854690
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34885) - you deserved it (3305)

On 08/26/2013 at 1:51am - work - by luvmypony (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter managed to crash my car. It's okay though, the insurance will cover it. However, it won't cover all the items she damaged crashing into a garage sale. FML

#20856229
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40592) - you deserved it (3284)

On 08/27/2013 at 6:17am - kids - by Idontknowwhattodo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I turned around after loading the washing machine to discover my husband's 89-year-old grandmother dropping her pants. She looked at me and said, "I hope you don't mind but when you got to go, you got to go." She then sat down on the toilet and let out a loud, long fart. FML

#20857413
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36986) - you deserved it (3273)

On 08/28/2013 at 12:48am - misc - by Grandmas lost it - United States (New York)

Today, I showed up at my brother's house for a visit. Little did I know, there was a family gathering. My bestfriend was invited and I wasn't. She's "more fun and less awkward" than I am. FML

#20864835
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39413) - you deserved it (3266)

On 09/02/2013 at 5:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my first date in years cancelled on me because she has to "wash the horse's hair." The date was arranged for 9:30pm. FML

#20857695
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39860) - you deserved it (3264)

On 08/28/2013 at 9:25am - misc - by AtLeastHaveADecientExcuse -

Today, I asked a cute guy for his number but instead he gave it to my gay friend. When my friend later called him, it turned out that he'd given him his number just to get rid of me and wasn't expecting him to call. FML

#20858957
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38240) - you deserved it (3258)

On 08/29/2013 at 6:44am - love - by sorejecteditmakesmewannacry (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I used a restroom. While doing my thing, the power in my building completely went out. There was another person in the restroom making demonic noises and scratching at my stall. When the power came back on, he was gone. I think I'm being haunted. FML

#20867818
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47300) - you deserved it (3256)

On 09/04/2013 at 6:46pm - work - by dear god help me. - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my dad tore my room apart for the second time, looking for drug-making equipment. His reasoning is that I must be dealing drugs, because I'm a chemistry major who likes to watch Breaking Bad. FML

#20863540
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44998) - you deserved it (3244)

On 09/01/2013 at 7:06pm - misc - by WaltTheFuckDad (man) - United States (California)

Today, I won a lottery at my local grocery store. Excited, I went to claim my prize, only to discover it was a bottle of red wine. I'm a recovering alcoholic. FML

#20858175
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43471) - you deserved it (3235)

On 08/28/2013 at 5:47pm - misc - by notsolucky - United States (Connecticut)



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