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Saturday 6 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I made two cakes. One for my boyfriend's birthday tomorrow, the other for my family so they wouldn't eat the birthday cake. I came home to find they ate half of each. FML

Today, I finally worked up the courage to ask my crush to a movie. What I didn't realise is that she would bring a "friend" along, and that I would have to sit next to them making out for 2 hours. FML

#20772026
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49142) - you deserved it (3755)

On 07/09/2013 at 7:05am - love - by thirdwheel - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got lost, and eventually noticed that I'd passed by the same house a few times. Apparently somebody who lives on that street noticed as well, because the next time I passed by, the police were waiting for me. FML

#20776976
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41923) - you deserved it (3747)

On 07/12/2013 at 12:36am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was drinking from a cup with a built-in straw. After taking a long sip, I noticed a weird taste. Upon investigation, I found a small caterpillar wedged inside the straw. FML

#20768067
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41630) - you deserved it (3709)

On 07/07/2013 at 1:09am - misc - by yum - United States (California)

Today, I was out on a leisurely jog. Out of nowhere, a car slowed down in the street, and a passenger screamed "HAPPY 4TH OF JULY, MOTHERFUCKER," before tossing a lit Roman Candle at my feet. FML

#20763905
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42716) - you deserved it (3690)

On 07/04/2013 at 6:30pm - health - by Your ass... Grab it... (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of over a year has been cheating on me the whole time, but that "it's just physical". However, he doesn't want to do anything "physical" with me, except cuddle when we're together. FML

#20774465
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42787) - you deserved it (3674)

On 07/10/2013 at 3:08pm - love - by heartbroken (woman) - Australia

Today, one of my co-workers was fired after my manager discovered him pissing in the office coffee pot. I had three cups before I found out what had happened. FML

#20780355
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46696) - you deserved it (3673)

On 07/13/2013 at 5:10pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I politely asked a man to not sleep on a tram stop that I had to clean. He got up, and while I leaned forward to pick up some trash from the ground nearby, I felt a warm stream on my back. Now I can't get the smell of urine off my clothes. FML

#20769987
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43590) - you deserved it (3654)

On 07/08/2013 at 1:57am - work - by FUCK.THIS.JOB. (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I woke up at my cousin's house after staying the night. I went into the bathroom like I usually do and shut the door. Apparently the door lock on this bathroom doesn't function properly. I discovered this when my 4-year-old cousin walked in on me putting a tampon in. FML

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend gives out my number to guys who ask for hers. Let's just say that I'll never be able to unsee the pictures that were sent to me. FML

#20768089
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47095) - you deserved it (3612)

On 07/07/2013 at 1:21am - intimacy - by nomorenakedpicsplease - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when a girl came out of nowhere, screaming at me for cheating on her, and saying she was dumping me. I've never seen her before, and she was almost grinning during her little act, but my girlfriend believed it, and I'm now single. FML

#20779978
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61761) - you deserved it (3543)

On 07/13/2013 at 1:33pm - love - by fuckingtrollingskankwhoreshitwankcuntfuck (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my girlfriend of over four years cheated on me in revenge for me abandoning our date last night. I'm a surgeon on call at the local hospital. FML

#20780398
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59108) - you deserved it (3531)

On 07/13/2013 at 5:39pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

#20773595
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73142) - you deserved it (3515)

On 07/10/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Wtf (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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