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Thursday 4 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I came back to my apartment after moving most of my stuff out. Upon returning, I learned that my now ex-roommate drank all of my alcohol and threw away my things, thinking that I had forgotten them. FML

#20764102
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37570) - you deserved it (3515)

On 07/04/2013 at 9:32pm - misc - by uvagirl - United States

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

#20757332
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54014) - you deserved it (3468)

On 07/01/2013 at 1:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had the questionable honor of explaining the difference between "your" and "you're" to my boss, and very diplomatically make her see why her poor grasp of language could affect our credibility as a communication agency. I'm Swedish, and English is my third language. She's American. FML

#20761131
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53343) - you deserved it (3438)

On 07/03/2013 at 2:48am - work - by grammarnazi-forareason (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was reading a newspaper at a bus stop when a creepy guy rested his chin on my shoulder and said, "I miss the good old days, when people would read newspapers together and it wasn't classed as weird." Then he walked away. FML

#20772742
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39285) - you deserved it (3429)

On 07/09/2013 at 4:57pm - misc - by help - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while having a serious talk with my father, he said, "Son, you're only alive because of a faulty, off-brand condom." FML

#20774202
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46954) - you deserved it (3316)

On 07/10/2013 at 12:33pm - misc - by my honest father - United States (Kansas)

Today, my mom signed me up for a swimming class to show my sister there's nothing to be afraid of. Considering I'm 17, I assumed I'd be in an advanced class. Instead, I get to spend summer blowing bubbles in the shallow end with four-year-olds as my little sister cheers me on from the steps. FML

#20758869
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38830) - you deserved it (3279)

On 07/01/2013 at 10:37pm - misc - by AwkwardPotato - United States (California)

Today, my older brother told me that the only reason I like cats is because they control minds. I laughed. He was serious. FML

#20771105
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34415) - you deserved it (3273)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:26pm - animals - by Zoey_M - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, working my job, I had to explain to a kid that Pokemon is owned by Nintendo and they don't make it for the Xbox. Upset by this, he took hold of my leg and started biting. I'm also suspended, because his mother complained when I kicked him off me. FML

#20771337
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49389) - you deserved it (3264)

On 07/08/2013 at 10:08pm - work - by Garchomp (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I came home from work to find white fabric and crystals all over the apartment floor. I followed the trail of destruction to my bedroom, where my roommate had left our closet door open. Apparently, her cats decided that my wedding gown was to be their newest conquest. FML

#20762512
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49125) - you deserved it (3233)

On 07/03/2013 at 10:40pm - animals - by nakedweddingday (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my mom bet my dad $100 that she could pay my boyfriend ten bucks to break up with me. She is now $90 richer. FML

#20760905
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48027) - you deserved it (3213)

On 07/03/2013 at 12:26am - money - by Forever Alone (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I returned home from an extended vacation only to find out my cousin wasn't kidding when he said he was going to steal my boyfriend. I thought I was dating a straight guy. FML

#20761976
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43474) - you deserved it (3207)

On 07/03/2013 at 4:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out why my bank balance is so unusually low. It turns out that I bought a car in Indonesia. I've never been to Indonesia. FML

#20766607
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53719) - you deserved it (3197)

On 07/06/2013 at 3:45am - money - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I found out how easy it is for people to get into my flat when I found bailiffs in my kitchen at 9am. They had picked the lock to look for someone who doesn't live at my address, but at least had the courtesy to tell me how to make my home more secure. FML



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