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Thursday 20 June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrivd in the mail. We burid her yesterday. FML

#20731352
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69258) - you deserved it (3975)

On 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by hinting (man) - United States (Michigan)

2day I Went On A Date With A Seemingly Really Awesome Guy. It Went Quite Well, Until Dessert Came An He Started Telling Me Y Bestiality "isn't Really So Wrong, U Know?" Riiiggghhttt. Looks Like I'm Still Single. Mega FML

#20742848
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43512) - you deserved it (3961)

On 06/23/2013 at 3:39pm - love - by kittyfiddlernono (woman) - Bulgaria (Pernik)

Today... it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnome in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras...hich I thought had deterred the idiot... until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnome on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. fat FML

#20742609
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60091) - you deserved it (3932)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm - misc - by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck (man) - Guam

Today... while walking around town... some guy grabbd me from behind... clutchd at mah nipples... and said... "That's where I always imagind they were." FML

#20746398
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51757) - you deserved it (3908)

On 06/25/2013 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my duty manager demanded we close the bar early because she wanted to go home . I was subject to abuse from customer fir closing early, then shouted at by the duty manager fir not being done . My actual bar manager fired me fir closing early . FML

#20734756
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46389) - you deserved it (3841)

On 06/19/2013 at 3:18am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Yesterday, I went to the gynecologist. In the waiting room they had decorative words that spelld out "Relax" an "Enjoy". mega FML

#20732921
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36785) - you deserved it (3788)

On 06/18/2013 at 6:44am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today mah fiancée decidd to go on a "vacation." Our wedding is tomorrow. FML

#20750126
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54136) - you deserved it (3781)

On 06/27/2013 at 11:17am - misc - by Guntherdog - United States

Today, I was going to set up mah air conditioner in the window. As I opend up the window, I must have disturbd a wasp nest, cuz a dozen wasps flew in and several of them stung me. The rest r now somewhere in mah house with mah terrifid girlfriend. FML

#20748461
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41726) - you deserved it (3742)

On 06/26/2013 at 1:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I took mah cat to tha vat. Tha craapy vat lookad ma in tha ayas and said, "This isn't tha only pussy I'll ba chacking out today." FML

#20742647
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51673) - you deserved it (3678)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:26pm - misc - by o_O (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, at mah job at mah tattoo parlor, yet another client offered to pay for his tattoo by "letting" me sleep with him. This client happens to be mah boyfriend's best friend, whose girlfriend is having me looool tattoo his name on her wrist next week. FML

#20735377
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49604) - you deserved it (3673)

On 06/19/2013 at 2:46pm - work - by notkatvond (woman) - United States

Today, I held a party for mah family so I could announce mah pregnancy. In the middle of mah speech, mah mother stoppd me, saying, "Nobody gives a rat's ass, where's the booze?" FML

#20745652
83 comments

Today.!! !! boss frd me fir being ( too morally ambiguous ) !! I work at a bagel shop and had told a customer that I was indifferent towards cream cheese !! FML

#20749746
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38543) - you deserved it (3630)

On 06/27/2013 at 2:22am - work - by confusedbagel (woman) - United States (California)

Today I got harassd an screamd at by a middle-agd man for parking in a spot close to the store because he wantd the same spot so he didn't have to walk so far with his groceries !! He took a photo an vowd to report me to the authorities !! FML

#20746334
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40786) - you deserved it (3605)

On 06/25/2013 at 12:23pm - work - by couch girl - Singapore



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