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Friday 14 June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I heard my roommate moaning my name in the shower. FML

#20728960
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58070) - you deserved it (5925)

On 06/16/2013 at 7:37am - intimacy - by idontwanttoknow - United States

Today, while running on the treadmill at the gym, I tried to wipe some sweat off my brow before it could make its way down into my eye. I ended up poking myself in the eye so hard that I yelped, stumbled and was thrown off the still-moving treadmill while trying to regain my balance. FML

#20738117
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34256) - you deserved it (5878)

On 06/20/2013 at 11:06pm - health - by Ouch (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I learned that the money I work hard for on YouTube has been transferred to the wrong person's banking account. That person is my ex-girlfriend. FML

#20732776
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44337) - you deserved it (5865)

On 06/18/2013 at 2:35am - money - by Broccolliboyy (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I walked into the living room, only to find my brother wanking off to an episode of My Little Pony. FML

#20726036
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58808) - you deserved it (5834)

On 06/14/2013 at 6:29pm - intimacy - by bestiality, not even once (woman) - Ireland (Waterford)

Today, I woke up at 5:30 and made the half hour drive to work only to find out that it was my day off. After finally getting back home and into bed, my boss called, requesting that I come back to work since I was "already up". FML

#20726806
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44786) - you deserved it (5743)

On 06/15/2013 at 1:41am - work - by Shitty Boss Shitty Job - United States (Iowa)

Today, I started playing softball again in a league after not playing for about 5 years. My very first time at the bat I whacked a foul ball into the parking lot and hit my own car. FML

#20724193
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39726) - you deserved it (5476)

On 06/13/2013 at 7:59pm - misc - by Dingbat - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend and I talked about our past relationships. He said he broke up with his last girlfriend because she was "too smart" for him, and that he felt better being with someone who "doesn't have too many lights on upstairs, if you know what I mean." FML

#20729746
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47173) - you deserved it (5447)

On 06/16/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by ... (woman) - South Africa (Eastern Cape)

Today, I was in the bathroom at work when I ran out of toilet paper. There was another guy in the restroom so I asked him if he could hand me a roll. He laughed, called me a dumbass, turned off the lights and walked out. FML

#20717345
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47698) - you deserved it (5398)

On 06/10/2013 at 11:55am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, in class, we were discussing stereotypes. We were asked about common ones about nearby cities. A guy said, "Well, they say Lumberton has the prettiest girls." My teacher asked if any of us were from Lumberton, so I raised my hand. The guy quickly said, "Nevermind." FML

#20717445
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53393) - you deserved it (5210)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:04pm - misc - by wellthanks (woman) - United States

Today, as I was walking home, I noticed a man and a woman arguing in their driveway. To avoid an awkward situation, I crossed the street. I then had to walk past a creepy guy watering his plants in his underwear while looking directly at me. FML

#20732528
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34387) - you deserved it (5176)

On 06/18/2013 at 12:07am - misc - by ProAwkward - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend told me he hasn't been to the dentist in two years and definitely doesn't plan on it because, "That's just how the government steals more money." FML

#20734761
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37478) - you deserved it (5152)

On 06/19/2013 at 3:22am - misc - by RoyallyGrossedOut (woman) - United States

Today, I walked in on my grandma playing with herself. Every time I close my eyes, I see things that no mortal was ever meant to see. FML

#20739366
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61868) - you deserved it (5026)

On 06/21/2013 at 5:00pm - intimacy - by bleeeaaaaaacccccchhhhhhhh (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I turned 29. To celebrate, my office got me a cake that read "Happy 38th!!" The "theme" of the "party" was 'Not a day over 35!' I waited all day for someone to tell me it was all a prank, but nobody did. I spent my lunch hour crying in my car. Happy birthday to me. FML

#20732995
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52219) - you deserved it (5022)

On 06/18/2013 at 9:06am - work - by Not a day over 35 (woman) - United States (Alaska)



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