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Wednesday 12 June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today My Usband Of 3 Years Learnd Tat E's Going To Be A Fater. No I'm Not Pregnant. FML

#20726687
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63999) - you deserved it (3919)

On 06/15/2013 at 12:28am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today , mah best friend called me a moron fir disputing her belief that Canada is in South America. FML

#20729679
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44004) - you deserved it (3887)

On 06/16/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by not a brain cell in sight (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Yesterday Mah Boyfriend Threw Out Mah Old Voicemail Recorder, Thinking It Was Junk . My Father Passd Away Yeres Ago . I Kept A Recording Of The Last Voicemail He'd Left Me On It So I'd Alway Remember His Voice . FML

#20718168
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76400) - you deserved it (3854)

On 06/10/2013 at 7:35pm - misc - by Upset (woman) - United States

Today, my duty manager demanded we close the bar early because she wanted to go home . I was subject to abuse from customer fir closing early, then shouted at by the duty manager fir not being done . My actual bar manager fired me fir closing early . FML

#20734756
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46389) - you deserved it (3841)

On 06/19/2013 at 3:18am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, my mother and grandmother informd me that my sixteen-year-old dog did. I was standing in Wal-Mart at the time. They then yelld at me because crying in public is "inappropriate." FML

#20716871
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51739) - you deserved it (3819)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:26am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today... I went to a bar fir some drinks. A guy looked me up and down... gave me a suggestive smile... then asked fir mah name and number. I'd have been a little less creeped out if he hadn't been standing beside me at the urinal the whole time. looool FML

#20728225
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47897) - you deserved it (3817) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/15/2013 at 6:24pm - love - by Sovekipisse (man) - France (Pays de la Loire)

Yesterday, I went to the gynecologist. In the waiting room they had decorative words that spelld out "Relax" an "Enjoy". mega FML

#20732921
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36785) - you deserved it (3788)

On 06/18/2013 at 6:44am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today at a family reunion mah visibly drunk grandparents hered about mah new boyfriend who is a cop. My gran askd if he ever made me feel lyk Rodney King in the bedroom. Then mah grandpa fresh off a DUI askd if mah boyfriend's dick is as bent as the police force. FML

#20727456
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40174) - you deserved it (3721)

On 06/15/2013 at 1:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today... I donated blood for the first time. I'm completely healthy an after waiting the appropriate amount of time I left... feeling fine. That is until I went out to eat with mah family an hour later an passed out in front of thehole restaurant. FML

#20724782
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35447) - you deserved it (3695)

On 06/14/2013 at 12:39am - health - by hi_there4397 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, at mah job at mah tattoo parlor, yet another client offered to pay for his tattoo by "letting" me sleep with him. This client happens to be mah boyfriend's best friend, whose girlfriend is having me looool tattoo his name on her wrist next week. FML

#20735377
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49604) - you deserved it (3673)

On 06/19/2013 at 2:46pm - work - by notkatvond (woman) - United States

TODAY, MAH PARENTS TOOK MAH IPAD BACK TO THE STORE AN EXCHANGD IT 4 TWO CHEAP KNOCK OFF TABLETS. REASON BEING MAH LITTLE BROTHER THREATEND TO RUN AWAY CUZ I HAD ONE AN HE DIDN'T. I BOUGHT THE IPAD ON MAH OWN AFTER GRADUATION. THEY KEPT THE DIFFERENCE IN PRICE. FML

Today, I ordered some burger at a fast food joint. When I said, "No lettuce," the cashier looked dumbfounded and asked, "What's that?" I literally had to say, "The green stuff" before she got it. I'm loosing hope. FML

#20724048
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51678) - you deserved it (3506)

On 06/13/2013 at 6:12pm - misc - by thatisfuckedup - United Kingdom

TODAY , DAD CUMMED HOME FROM A TRIP TO ARIZONA AN BROUGHT BACK SPECIAL HAND-PICKED GIFTS FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY. WHEN HE GOT TO ME , HE SMILED , AN PULLED OUT A FREE LOTION FROM THE HOTEL AT WHICH HE WAS STAYING. FML

#20729197
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42784) - you deserved it (3478)

On 06/16/2013 at 11:46am - misc - by loveyadad (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



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