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Friday 7 June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend and I watched the new movie "The Purge." After the movie, I jokingly asked him that if the U.S. had such a purge in real life, would he participate, and who would he kill first. Without missing a beat, he said, "you." FML

#20714140
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41234) - you deserved it (8085)

On 06/08/2013 at 7:43pm - misc - by purged (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in a while. I was doing upper body workouts and decided to ask a very large man to spot me while I did bench presses. As he stood over me, I saw two beads of sweat roll off his nose. One hit me on the cheek. The other landed in my open mouth. FML

#20709141
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45473) - you deserved it (7954)

On 06/06/2013 at 4:49am - misc - by dollabill009 - United States

Today, I was bombarded with phone calls from debt collectors. After some investigation, it turns out my grandma, who has dementia, has been going into our mailbox and throwing away the outgoing mail because it wasn't addressed to her. I'm now apparently 3 months behind in payments. FML

#20720825
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45601) - you deserved it (7732)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:57am - money - by redvolvo23 - United States

Today, my 6-year-old son was so angry at me for not buying him overpriced candy at the airport, that he told a security guard I had a machine gun in my suitcase. The interrogation was not pleasant. FML

#20703790
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61026) - you deserved it (7642)

On 06/03/2013 at 5:16pm - kids - by VDM (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was at a swim meet, swimming as hard as I'd ever swum before. During the last lap I saw no one in the lanes next to me. Thinking I was first, I became extremely excited. When I came to the wall, I realized the reason no one else was around: They already finished the race. I was last. FML

#20724700
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48701) - you deserved it (7285)

On 06/14/2013 at 12:06am - misc - by :( - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend got into bed with me and started fooling around. I had a terrible migraine, which she knew, so I asked her to stop because it wasn't helping. She then yelled at me for being "ungrateful" and "selfish", and accused me of secretly being gay. FML

#20725929
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45755) - you deserved it (7250)

On 06/14/2013 at 5:21pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

#20724998
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73275) - you deserved it (7241)

On 06/14/2013 at 2:48am - love - by explanations (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband farted, grabbed a fan and blew the smell right at me. Disgusted, I reminded him that I’m a lady, not a dude. He burst out laughing and sang, "Dude looks like a lady." FML

#20716353
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39705) - you deserved it (7208)

On 06/09/2013 at 9:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I got a concussion and several staples in my head. As it turns out, watering flowers is much more dangerous than it might sound. FML

#20716424
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36730) - you deserved it (7112)

On 06/09/2013 at 10:27pm - health - by Sean - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked if I could grow out my pubic hair since I usually wax it. He said his mom has a full bush and he always thought it looks better that way. FML

#20719191
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84194) - you deserved it (6915)

On 06/11/2013 at 8:00am - intimacy - by notyourmom (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for not remembering our anniversary. Our three week anniversary. FML

#20702606
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58823) - you deserved it (6828)

On 06/03/2013 at 12:31am - love - by BadBoyfriend - United States (Texas)

Today, whilst trying on wedding dresses with my mom, she told me that I looked fat and awful in the dress I liked. When I told her how hurtful she was being, she told me that I should be grateful that she told me what she thought instead of laughing at me behind my back. FML

#20722079
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43425) - you deserved it (6737)

On 06/12/2013 at 6:09pm - misc - by mysea8679 (woman) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, I was invited to a party. Since I rarely get invited to any, I was super pumped. Both my parents work late, so I texted a couple of people to see if I could catch a ride. It turned out everyone's cars were full. I ended up missing one of the only parties I've ever been invited to. FML

#20702631
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52431) - you deserved it (6714)

On 06/03/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by my_only_friend (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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