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Sunday 19 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my piano teacher complimented my song, calling it great. I was proud and thanked him, then realized he was being sarcastic. FML

#20683283
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37023) - you deserved it (4637)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, a group of guys came into my restaurant, dressed up in some kind of role-playing game clothing. Apparently I pronounced one of their fake elf names wrong, because the guy complained to my manager, who then bitched me out in front of everyone for upsetting the customers. FML

#20685944
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46026) - you deserved it (4610)

On 05/25/2013 at 6:13pm - work - by leela (woman) - United States

Today, my parents decided that since summer is almost here, it's a great opportunity to start having nude barbecues. I found this out after walking out into the backyard, hoping to sun myself a little, only to see the living nightmare that is my parents' naked bodies. FML

#20686007
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50616) - you deserved it (4609)

On 05/25/2013 at 6:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my fiancé and I were planning to move to a cheaper apartment which my mother agreed to rent us. She was very supportive and excited that we'd be closer, and it was great until she gave us a list of books, movies, games, etc. that we can't bring because they're "demonic". FML

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

#20680679
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58381) - you deserved it (4543)

On 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a call from work stating that my employment was being terminated. This was after being suspended while they investigated my sexual harassment claim. Their reason for firing me: misuse of company time. Yes, I suppose reporting being sexually harassed is a huge waste of time. FML

#20681249
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48113) - you deserved it (4478)

On 05/23/2013 at 3:24am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because she apparently saw me making out with her sister. She doesn't even have a sister. FML

#20671163
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52674) - you deserved it (4461)

On 05/18/2013 at 3:34pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML

#20675286
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50708) - you deserved it (4448)

On 05/20/2013 at 12:02pm - misc - by well okay then - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML

#20665284
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66616) - you deserved it (4361)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my mom accused my cat of being a "manipulator", and said that we should get rid of him. FML

#20683274
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36298) - you deserved it (4351)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:04am - animals - by seriously - United States

Today, my uncle drove to my house in his tractor, beer in one hand, and a radio strapped to the dash blasting country music at unimaginable volume. Neither of us live on a farm. Half the neighborhood stood angrily glaring at us until we went inside. FML

#20684256
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40023) - you deserved it (4344)

On 05/24/2013 at 6:48pm - misc - by unwilling redneck - United States

Today, my parents told me they're glad I'm an "ugly nerd" because they don't have to worry about me getting into trouble or having a teen pregnancy. FML

#20686197
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49557) - you deserved it (4295)

On 05/25/2013 at 8:45pm - misc - by uglynerd (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went into the men's restroom and started peeing in a urinal next to a middle-age man. As he zipped up and walked away, he said to me, "Don't worry, it'll grow." FML

#20663182
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44425) - you deserved it (4292)

On 05/14/2013 at 4:09pm - health - by DrewK (man) - United States (Virginia)



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