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Wednesday 15 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML

#20668913
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43830) - you deserved it (2824)

On 05/17/2013 at 11:52am - misc - by Sonofa - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML

#20668592
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44483) - you deserved it (2808)

On 05/17/2013 at 5:25am - misc - by Jololol - United States

Today, a woman approached me in the street and slapped me, ranting about how I stole her man. I don't even know her man, or her, and I live over a thousand miles away in Scotland. I'm back in town for the first time since my childhood to attend a wedding. FML

#20661106
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45172) - you deserved it (2798)

On 05/13/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by culodegrillo (woman) - Spain

Today, while doing a fun genetics game in Biology, I found out that I was adopted. Turns out the game wasn't so fun. FML

#20661511
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50349) - you deserved it (2767)

On 05/13/2013 at 7:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after finding out that I would never be able to move my dominant arm again, I decided to talk to my best friend about it because it was getting to me. She responded with, "It really bugs me that you made this conversation all about you." FML

#20665722
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45554) - you deserved it (2729)

On 05/15/2013 at 7:43pm - health - by LordCrafte (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I e-mailed the on-line instructor for my job, telling her that I had fallen behind in my work due to my grandmother's passing and the subsequent funeral arrangements, but that I would catch up this week. Her reply? "OK. Hope your grandmother gets better soon." FML

#20679441
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41639) - you deserved it (2724)

On 05/22/2013 at 8:28am - misc - by projectfain - United States (Ohio)

Today, I called my mother to tell her that I got engaged. In the 15 minute conversation that followed, 13 were spent listening to how this is going to affect her. FML

#20665269
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37104) - you deserved it (2718)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my allergies started up with a vengeance. Yesterday I broke 4 ribs and fractured my sternum. Every time I sneeze, I swear I can feel the broken bones move around. FML

Today, I was notified that the company did not give me a raise two months ago like I thought. The increase was a typo. Two months ago I wrote a thank you for the raise email to my boss. Now I get to write a check to the company to pay back my "raise." FML

#20676088
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33659) - you deserved it (2666)

On 05/20/2013 at 7:07pm - work - by Check Writer - United States (California)

Today, I was told I would not be getting the job I was offered because I failed my drug test. They never gave me a drug test. FML

#20660591
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46300) - you deserved it (2642)

On 05/13/2013 at 10:39am - work - by Confused (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I had my first job as a wedding planner. I'd spent a year making sure everything was right. After the wedding my friend comforted me by saying, "You had to have known it wasn't going to be perfect." I knew that it wouldn't be perfect, but I had expected the groom to at least show up. FML

#20676942
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39283) - you deserved it (2554)

On 05/21/2013 at 12:10am - work - by future walmart employee (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while at a concert, I stepped into a restroom to use my nasal spray since my allergies were acting up. Apparently, someone thought that I had been snorting coke in the stall. I was escorted outside and had to wait for the cops until I could explain everything. I missed the headliner. FML

#20677338
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39277) - you deserved it (2543)

On 05/21/2013 at 7:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I reconnected with my best friend from childhood, and after a tearful confession, found out that for most of my engagement to my husband, she was repeatedly connecting with his penis. FML

#20672990
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38495) - you deserved it (2525)

On 05/19/2013 at 1:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)



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