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Wednesday 15 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

2day I thought the public restroom I was in was empty, so I startd rapping!! I realizd the room was emptyhen, recognizing the song, the person one stall over joind in!! FML

#20677562
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27282) - you deserved it (39523)

On 05/21/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by crappingrapping - United States

Today I got a tattoo of the snake an staff medical symbol on mah wrist . Now everyone keeps asking what illness I have; they think it's a medical bracelet substitute . FML

#20666917
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20520) - you deserved it (36810)

On 05/16/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by Calaraphea (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Yesterday, I was roasting marshmallows around a campfire when mine burst into flames. I instinctively shook the stick to get it to go out. The flaming marshmallow then catapulted straight into my eye, burning my whole eyelid. FML

#20672246
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44033) - you deserved it (25676)

On 05/19/2013 at 1:26am - misc - by Devin - United States

yesterday I woke up to mah dad emptying a water bottle on mah head, cuz I needed to "get up 4 school" or I'd be late. big fat FML

#20662590
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30495) - you deserved it (22998)

On 05/14/2013 at 7:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I visited my grandparents at tere farm. Wen I went to pee in te outouse, I noticed a round ting in te middle of te ole, so I peed on it. It was a beeive. FML

#20660609
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42564) - you deserved it (21144)

On 05/13/2013 at 11:06am - animals - by random (man) - United States

Today... I lent a pair of expensive headphone to a "friend" 4 the weekend. As a thank-you... he bought me a soda. He moved this weekend... taking the headphone with him. I lost a $250 pair of headphone 4 a $1 soda. FML

#20672107
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41519) - you deserved it (20017)

On 05/19/2013 at 12:16am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Montana)

Yesterday , my girlfriend and I were about to have sex 4 the first time when her mother unexpectedly cummd home. In the rush to get dressd , we accidentally put on each other's shirts. Her mom noticd. FML

#20670515
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51541) - you deserved it (19633)

On 05/18/2013 at 8:54am - intimacy - by lez probs - United States

Today, mah doorknob broke. While trying to impress mah dad and show that I can fix things 4 grls, I somehow managed to lock myself in mah room, with the doorknob on the other side of the door. When mah dad finally heard mah screams, he let me out. He had to take thehole door off. FML

#20662901
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34054) - you deserved it (18449)

On 05/14/2013 at 1:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I walkd in on ma usband making out wit is accountant, te same woman wo comfortd me wen e ceatd on me te year before. FML

#20675748
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52819) - you deserved it (17484)

On 05/20/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today.. . I had to listen to yet another delusional fuckface at school bitch about how a grl he's interested in putted him in the "friend-zone" . I really couldn't focus on mah work.. . so I tried to shut him up by saying he's an idiot.. . least because she already has a boyfriend . I now have a black eye . FML

#20667310
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35617) - you deserved it (16150)

On 05/16/2013 at 4:31pm - health - by getafucktoysomewhereelsedude (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a mosquito bite inside cast. I slipped a ruler into it and started scratching to relieve the itch. Part of the ruler ended up snapping off inside. FML

#20669324
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41910) - you deserved it (14392)

On 05/17/2013 at 4:49pm - health - by sprainedankle - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

yesterday I was in a big Skype chat,hich somehow turned into a heated argument . My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door . FML

#20669389
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49813) - you deserved it (13537)

On 05/17/2013 at 5:16pm - health - by -1 friend (man) - United States (Florida)

yesterday I decidd to treat myself to a pedicure ahead of my cousin's wedding. The woman doing my nails askd if I wantd my toe hairs trimmd. I was so taken aback and embarrassd that I said yes. They chargd me extra. FML

#20679773
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36229) - you deserved it (12803)

On 05/22/2013 at 1:40pm - misc - by hobbit - United States (Massachusetts)



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