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Sunday 12 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

TODAY, I WAS IN A BATHROOM STALL AND I ACCIDENTALLY DROPPD MAH NEW TAMPON ON THE GROUND. JUST AS I WAS ABOUT TO REACH FOR IT, I HEARD A VOICE ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE STALL SAY, "OH GREAT, I NEEDD THAT" AND THEN A HAND REACHD UNDER MAH STALL AND GRABBD IT. IT WAS MAH LAST ONE. FML

#20647074
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60574) - you deserved it (4736)

On 05/07/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by the girl next door (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I heard noise outside my front door. I looked out through the window, only to see my boyfriend encouraging his dog to take a dump on my welcome mat. FML

#20663152
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42079) - you deserved it (4691)

On 05/14/2013 at 3:52pm - love - by wellokaythen (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

after my mom picked me up from the mall, she asked me wat was in my bag from Gap. I wouldn't tell her, an she ended up grounding me. It was her Mother's Day present. mega FML

#20645473
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60542) - you deserved it (4652)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:08pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

today my boyfriend bought me a silver necklace. I have a silver allergy, but I thankd him anyway and encouragd him to return it. I found out later that he knew about my allergy all along and bought it on purpose so he could return it, get a refund, and still look good. FML

#20652174
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58315) - you deserved it (4636)

On 05/09/2013 at 3:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, the couch I bought a week ago was deliverd . I don't knowhich is worse: my son bieng the one to point out it's been "usd", or that he usd a black light to prove it . FML

#20672414
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49361) - you deserved it (4509)

On 05/19/2013 at 3:35am - kids - by disappointed dad - United States

Today, while at the supermarket, a complete stranger ran up to me, got down on his knee and confessed his love for me. He was obviously mentally unstable, so I gently declined. He started crying very loudly in front of everyone. I still don't have a clue who he was. real FML

#20654488
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46457) - you deserved it (4439)

On 05/10/2013 at 4:11pm - misc - by o___O" (woman) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Taday mah manager calld me in to tell me I got the promotion I've been hoping for. He then said that since I didn't look excitd about it he might have to rethink it. I was too busy concentrating on holding in diarrhea. FML

#20645244
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54754) - you deserved it (4359)

On 05/06/2013 at 11:25am - work - by perfecttiming (man) - United States (California)

Today , girlfriend dumped me cuz she apparently saw me making out with her sister. She doesn't even have a sister. FML

#20671163
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51418) - you deserved it (4354)

On 05/18/2013 at 3:34pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

TODAY I WAS IN THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE WAITING 4 MY HUSBAND TO ARRIVE WHEN A LITTLE OLD LADY SAT BESIDE ME. SHE SEEMED NICE UNTIL SHE STARTED FARTING AND BLAMING IT ON ME. THEY WEREN'T SILENT; THEY SOUNDED LYK TRUCKER FARTS AND SMELLED LYK DEATH. I WAS THERE 4 OVER AN HOUR. FML

#20647820
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47367) - you deserved it (4278)

On 05/07/2013 at 3:07pm - misc - by babs (woman) - United States

Today , I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. big fat FML

#20665284
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63541) - you deserved it (4143)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I went into the men's restroom and startd peeing in a urinal next to a middle-age man. As he zippd up and walkd away, he said to me, "Don't worry, it'll grow." mega FML

#20663182
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42002) - you deserved it (4071)

On 05/14/2013 at 4:09pm - health - by DrewK (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up to my friend stroking my face with the bottom of his foot and whispering, "Shh, your okay."

#20661280
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39653) - you deserved it (4058)

On 05/13/2013 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Hawaii)

TODAY , MAH BOYFRIEND YELLED AT ME. APPARENTLY I'M NOT THE ( CLASSY GRL ) HE THOUGHT I WAS , AN HE'S NOT COMFORTABLE ( DOING SUCH VILE THINGS IN PUBLIC. ) I HAD TRIED TO HOLD HIS HAND. FML

#20664518
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51126) - you deserved it (4041)

On 05/15/2013 at 2:43am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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