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July 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, thinking no one was home, I decided to be a little frisky with my boyfriend. I guess I was being loud and woke up my sleeping autistic brother the room over. Halfway through, he burst through the door, panicking. He thought I was having another one of my asthma attacks. FML

#21448923
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19711) - you deserved it (6422)

On 07/29/2015 at 2:15am - intimacy - by oops - United States

Today, after having to spend over an hour yesterday giving the man I'm in love with advice on how to impress his date yesterday evening, I got to spend another hour listening to how great their sex was last night. FML

#21442664
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23850) - you deserved it (6148)

On 07/16/2015 at 5:00pm - intimacy - by jealousgirl - United Kingdom

Today, I went to a restaurant and asked for vegetarian options. They told me, "We have a chicken Caesar salad, will that work?" FML

#21436862
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21489) - you deserved it (5926)

On 07/05/2015 at 3:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I decided I wanted to bleach my hair, so I asked my mother for help. Apparently, something went wrong, because clumps of my hair started falling out. Now I'm half blonde and half bald, and my mom is just laughing at me. FML

#21436042
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22439) - you deserved it (5812)

On 07/03/2015 at 8:54pm - misc - by notquitejuliet - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had to lie to my coworkers about me and some guy beating the absolute shite out of each other in a bar fight, all to avoid admitting my black eye was from my 7 year old son punching me in the face the other day. FML

#21436121
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20722) - you deserved it (5765)

On 07/03/2015 at 11:41pm - health - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was finally going to break down my social barrier by going out on a date with a nice guy I recently met on a dating site. Just at the start of the date, he asked me how old I was, and out of pure nervousness, I blurted out, "12!" I'm 24. FML

#21437546
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22530) - you deserved it (5409)

On 07/06/2015 at 7:02pm - love - by 12yearsoldapparently (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I guest-played as a catcher for a new fastpitch softball team. After the first couple of innings, the batter fouled a ball back into my catcher's mask. As a concussion test, the coach asked me what her name was. I decided to fake the concussion rather than admit that I'd forgotten her name. FML

#21438439
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23272) - you deserved it (5206)

On 07/08/2015 at 9:58am - health - by Softball - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, it's got to the point where my parents have to force me to plan social outings. FML

#21442703
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21468) - you deserved it (5001)

On 07/16/2015 at 6:47pm - misc - by TheDarth (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I took away my 8-year-old daughter's toy for throwing it too many times. She then said, "I need a beer." FML

#21440427
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21794) - you deserved it (4884)

On 07/12/2015 at 10:25am - kids - by brichard22 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom told me that she heard me and my best friend in my room grunting and talking about how hard we were. She said she loved me and accepted me no matter what. Thanks mom, but we were working out. FML

#21445547
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23953) - you deserved it (4880)

On 07/22/2015 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came home after just 3 weeks of being away. It seems like my pool now has its own mini-ecosystem. FML

#21443044
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21342) - you deserved it (4842)

On 07/17/2015 at 1:56pm - misc - by IssacB (man) - United States

Today, I took an online IQ test, even though I knew they give everyone unrealistically high scores. My score was 73. FML

#21436113
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21067) - you deserved it (4776)

On 07/03/2015 at 11:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I told my boyfriend of three years that I wanted to get married and have a child within the next five years. He responded by packing up my things and showing me the door. FML

#21447549
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21288) - you deserved it (4735)

On 07/26/2015 at 2:20pm - love - by rissa5214 - United States (Wisconsin)



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