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March 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I came home from a crazy costume party and took a hot shower. When I opened my eyes and saw the water running from my head was bloody, I freaked out and called my friend for help. She had to remind me that for the party, I'd coloured my hair red with washable hair dye. FML

#21376371
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22674) - you deserved it (15252)

On 03/17/2015 at 12:52pm - health - by Iwtumn (woman) - Austria

Today, I was so drunk that I forgot how to use the key to my front door. But I knew how to break a window, get into my locked basement, and unlock the basement door with my front door's key. FML

#21374433
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22592) - you deserved it (15236)

On 03/14/2015 at 12:52pm - misc - by nomorealcoholeva - Norway (Nordland)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I fell asleep in class... And woke up hour later. My teacher let me sit there till I woke up to see what my face would be like waking up to a new class. FML

#21382364
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23957) - you deserved it (15021)

On 03/27/2015 at 11:27am - misc - by BERNDTOAST - United States (Michigan)

Today, I shouted, "Fuck off!" out of reflex when I felt someone behind me grab my bag and pull it off my shoulder. It turned out to be an elderly man with a walking stick, who was trying to steady himself in a busy crowd. FML

#21380370
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25455) - you deserved it (13350)

On 03/23/2015 at 9:04pm - misc - by Li - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I accidentally ate a cat treat instead of a cinnamon glazed pecan. I thought it must have been burnt by the way it tasted, so ate a few more before I figured out my mistake and spat them out. FML

#21376174
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22494) - you deserved it (12252)

On 03/17/2015 at 3:14am - animals - by ilovecharliesheen (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a friend sent me a song. I didn't have time to listen to it all, so I listened to the first 30 seconds of it to get a feel for it. It was nice and uplifting, so I sent it to my mom. Turns out, after the first 30 seconds, the singer brightens his day by singing about his enormous penis. FML

#21366785
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24352) - you deserved it (11835)

On 03/02/2015 at 7:48pm - misc - by Microtron - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had to teach my grandma how to burn files to CDs. I jokingly said that it doesn't involve literally burning the disks in fire, to which she responded by slapping me and calling me a patronizing brat. FML

#21383501
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20350) - you deserved it (10976)

On 03/29/2015 at 10:03am - misc - by shamwazzlefarznarfnarfwoofbaaa (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out there's a support page on Facebook for people who have been "hurt" by me. FML

#21384648
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6587) - you deserved it (10723)

On 03/31/2015 at 9:41am - misc - by SupportPage - United States (California)

Today, I have been at my new job for almost a month and still have no idea what I'm doing. FML

#21367094
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26266) - you deserved it (10153)

On 03/03/2015 at 5:15am - work - by soconfused (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I found out how much those tiny dogs cost when my German Shepherd ate one. FML

#21377263
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (127) - you deserved it (9706)

On 03/18/2015 at 6:23pm - animals - by brokeforever (man) - Latvia (Riga)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, some homeless person came up to the window and started doing a voice-over. FML

#21374736
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (93) - you deserved it (9498)

On 03/14/2015 at 11:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was wearing a new tank top that was really cute. I later was talking to an attractive guy and thought he was giggling at me because he thought I was being cute and funny. I then realized he was giggling at the fact that I only shaved one armpit. FML

#21378703
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27252) - you deserved it (9273)

On 03/21/2015 at 12:25am - love - by rayraydayday - United States (Colorado)

Today, I thought I had carbon monoxide poisoning because I had the symptoms and my detector was going off. I called the fire dept, they checked me, they checked my apartment. My apartment is fine; I'm just out of shape, have high blood pressure, and don't know how to work simple electronics. FML

#21367736
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27393) - you deserved it (8840)

On 03/04/2015 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)



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