Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

November 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I found out my best friend made a program to reply to my text messages with random sentences from a list. It took 15 minutes of texting before I finally noticed. FML

#20959084
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38239) - you deserved it (5862)

On 11/15/2013 at 8:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - India (Gujarat)

Today, I'm moving from Arizona to Washington State with my 2 cats in my car. I've only just left and just learned that one cat gets carsick and the other stress farts. Only 956 more miles to go. FML

#20962468
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43177) - you deserved it (5850)

On 11/18/2013 at 6:47pm - animals - by Catcrap! - United States (California)

Today, my mom visited. While she was using the bathroom, my man-child of a husband thought it would be funny to knock on the bathroom door with his penis, thinking it was me in there. She opened the door to find him standing there doing the "helicopter". FML

#20969751
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55464) - you deserved it (5842)

On 11/25/2013 at 12:22am - intimacy - by LadyLola (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after moving miles to be with my boyfriend, I logged onto his computer just in time to see his other girlfriend had sent naked pictures. FML

#20972839
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51657) - you deserved it (5764)

On 11/27/2013 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by unluckylassy - Ireland

Today, while driving in the car with my father, he handed me his iPhone and asked me to Google "Is ObamaCare good for our country?" As soon as I typed in "Is", the first result was "Is olive oil good for anal." FML

#20942318
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59322) - you deserved it (5649)

On 11/02/2013 at 9:21am - intimacy - by justme - United States (Ohio)

Today, my parents kicked me out of the house because they were having a party. They gave me twenty bucks to go see a movie. Well, the movie ended pretty quick, but the trauma of seeing my parents in a swingers' orgy will take some time getting over. FML

#20969815
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67412) - you deserved it (5601)

On 11/25/2013 at 1:16am - intimacy - by why god - United States (California)

Today, everything that was beautiful and pure in my life turned into a terrible, warped version of what it once was. Today, I lost all hope, and no longer believe that life, although sometimes shitty, is sweet and worth living. Today, I met my mother-in-law. FML

#20949272
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53668) - you deserved it (5598)

On 11/07/2013 at 5:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Derry)

Today, I swallowed and nearly choked to death on the ring my boyfriend hid in my wine glass. It's still in me somewhere, and my doctor basically told me that I'll have to "keep an eye on things" if I want to find it. FML

#20967683
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46964) - you deserved it (5567)

On 11/23/2013 at 5:32am - love - by fecal romance (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend got on one knee and started talking about how we met. Knowing what was coming, I started tearing up, absolutely sure he was going to propose. Just as I was about to say yes, he quickly stood up and yelled "HAH, JUST KIDDING". FML

#20967193
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60090) - you deserved it (5559)

On 11/22/2013 at 7:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally worked up enough courage to ask out the guy I've had a crush on for months. I texted him, and he thought I was Maddy from work, not Maddie his neighbor. Now he and the Maddy from his work are dating. FML

#20945397
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53105) - you deserved it (5511)

On 11/04/2013 at 5:27pm - love - by :/ (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, for the tenth time, my teacher made a misbehaving student sit next to me as punishment. He begged for detention instead. FML

#20945365
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49827) - you deserved it (5488)

On 11/04/2013 at 5:01pm - misc - by WinkleBottom (man) - United States

Today, my 8-year-old came home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole class to write about how they felt when they learned that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML

#20942077
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55016) - you deserved it (5486)

On 11/02/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by SantaClaus - United States (California)

Today, I told my girlfriend I loved her. She left and never came back. FML

#20943458
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52336) - you deserved it (5447)

On 11/03/2013 at 4:57am - love - by Whatswrongwithme? (man) - United Kingdom



FML's blog

  • Angie's illustrated FML
  • Here we go again. This week I'm talking to you live from the Paris Japan Expo. I'm dressed up as Bernard from the Sailor Moon series, and I almost got kicked out because my katana wasn't the…

Friday 3 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: