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November 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I tripped and fell, damaging my sternum and making it incredibly painful to breathe in or out too much. About ten minutes later, I got the hiccups. FML

#20964854
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42202) - you deserved it (2461)

On 11/20/2013 at 6:53pm - health - by ChestExploding (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after having my sinuses draining for a couple days, my ma stopped by for a surprise visit. Upon discovering the trash can full of used tissues, she called my pastor grandfather to talk to me about the chronic masturbation problem I don't have, but that everyone now thinks I have. FML

Today, I was taken to the principal's office and bitched out about the dangerous weapon I brought to school. The "weapon" was a pocket fan. FML

#20967061
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37814) - you deserved it (2411)

On 11/22/2013 at 4:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was mentioning to a coworker how there was a huge lull today in business. A young coworker then turns to me and says in a snooty tone, "I think you mean a 'lol', it's pronounced L-O-L." FML

#20953649
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40371) - you deserved it (2394)

On 11/11/2013 at 5:36am - work - by shut up. - New Zealand

Today, I had to go to a big dinner with my insane relatives. Highlights of conversation included my sister telling us about the "country of Iowa", my dad accusing me of faking my chronic fatigue syndrome, and my grandpa claiming that Nelson Mandela is the Antichrist. FML

#20941414
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31932) - you deserved it (2376)

On 11/01/2013 at 2:38pm - misc - by FUCK ME, MAKE IT STOP (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, the package I've waited for months for finally arrived. It turned out it wasn't for me, but for my sister, who bought the same thing only 2 weeks ago. When I called, the company told me they received my payment, but that there were no more of the item in stock. FML

#20946407
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39706) - you deserved it (2367)

On 11/05/2013 at 12:34pm - misc - by GDubeau24 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mum staggered home, piss drunk. When I tried to walk her to her room, she shoved me away and cursed at me for being a "goody two-shoes". She then slurred "I fucked your mum", and informed me that my mum is a skank. That's good to know, mum. FML

#20958646
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38333) - you deserved it (2363)

On 11/15/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by mummer11 (woman) - Ireland

Today, I got an angry call to the phone shop where I work. The caller demanded that we give him his money back. His reason? He said he'd been tricked because his phone got ruined by water "even though he was using the waterproof application". FML

#20960536
70 comments

Today, I fell down in the street when a speeding car chucked a hard-boiled egg at my butt. While I waited for the feeling in my legs to return, they came back and threw more. FML

#20958238
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35021) - you deserved it (2324)

On 11/15/2013 at 12:00am - misc - by Eggs (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "our priorities aren't the same." Her priorities turned out to be getting into my coworker's pants. FML

#20969114
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37853) - you deserved it (2315)

On 11/24/2013 at 2:59pm - love - by bsulyingb (man) - United States

Today, I was taking some clean bedsheets down from the top of the wardrobe. As I pulled the top sheet down, a cat jumped onto my face, claws and all, before falling to the floor and running away. Thing is, I don't own a cat and I have no idea where in the house it has hidden now. FML

#20972130
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39187) - you deserved it (2296)

On 11/27/2013 at 2:08am - animals - by Seriously_Scaredy_Cat - United States

Today, while working at McDonald's, an angry customer called asking for his money back. Apparently we'd put 6 cheeseburgers in his bag instead of 5, he ate them all and now feels sick. FML

Today, I had a seizure in class. Being an epileptic, I had warned my professor of the possibility that I could have one in class. She was understanding and seemed very concerned about my issue at the time. After I had the seizure, however, she asked me if I had ever tried exorcism. FML

#20963219
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41613) - you deserved it (2262)

On 11/19/2013 at 10:00am - health - by seizuregirl17 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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