Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was mugged in a public bathroom. All I had on me was a plastic sheriff's badge, so I gave it to them. They laughed me out of the restroom. FML

#20928153
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35320) - you deserved it (3579)

On 10/20/2013 at 10:16pm - misc - by the_lameo_geek (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, someone stole my card number and tried to use it. Every transaction got declined, not because the bank knew it was a fraudulent charge, but because I'm so poor that he couldn't make even a single purchase. FML

Today, when I locked my newly repaired bike up, I carefully took the new rear light off it so that nobody could steal said light. Somebody stole my bike. At least I have a red light to play with. FML

#20936443
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37296) - you deserved it (3574)

On 10/28/2013 at 2:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, I tried to catch a train to get to my new job. I was stopped and told that I needed a pre-purchased ticket to enter the platform. The only way to get the ticket, they said, was by buying one on the platform. I arrived by taxi nearly an hour late for my first day. FML

#20916500
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35888) - you deserved it (3530)

On 10/11/2013 at 2:22pm - work - by sharkiewarkiemoosey (woman) - Switzerland (Ausser-Rhoden)

Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me over Facebook. Unfortunately, she "accidentally" posted it on my wall instead of sending me a message, so the whole world could see it. My mom liked her post. FML

#20939479
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46966) - you deserved it (3518)

On 10/30/2013 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got kicked out of English class shortly after our teacher told us we have to write an essay on how the storyline of Harry Potter is one big allegory for "the futility of socialism." Apparently, reacting with disbelief makes me a "disruptive influence." FML

#20905920
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34109) - you deserved it (3503)

On 10/03/2013 at 12:42pm - misc - by WTF? (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I finally decided to stand up for myself and quit my crappy job working for my abusive father. I gave him a few insults too, to which he reacted by calling the police and claiming I'd threatened to murder him. I spent three hours in jail before they finally let me go. FML

#20916390
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40133) - you deserved it (3490)

On 10/11/2013 at 12:43pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I woke up to my creepy new roommate licking my cheek. FML

#20909568
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45225) - you deserved it (3485)

On 10/06/2013 at 1:13pm - misc - by D: (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, after paying back the money my grandma lent me to fix my car, I stepped outside, only to see my car leaking antifreeze all over the driveway. I had to ask for the money back to fix it again. FML

#20916786
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40377) - you deserved it (3451)

On 10/11/2013 at 6:53pm - money - by broke_broken - United States (Utah)

Today, a customer called me "chink eyes", "dog eater", "bloody Chinese communist" and "ching chong." I'm black. FML

#20919376
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54073) - you deserved it (3428)

On 10/13/2013 at 9:14pm - work - by mustabeendrugs (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I spent an excruciating hour walking to campus with a broken leg, only to find my professor had left a note on the door saying class was canceled. FML

#20923929
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42928) - you deserved it (3400)

On 10/17/2013 at 12:34pm - health - by LegInPieces - United States (Washington)

Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my daughter trying to cut her wrist with a plastic spoon. When I asked her why, she said her friend Lucy did that so her parents would buy her pretty things. My daughter and Lucy are both four years old. FML

#20902425
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45934) - you deserved it (3397)

On 09/30/2013 at 7:54pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, my now ex-boyfriend actually claimed that his cheating didn't count because A) the other girl is his lab partner, and B) she's overweight. FML

#20933703
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43370) - you deserved it (3393)

On 10/25/2013 at 5:39pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: