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July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while jogging, a guy tackled me and got my iPhone. Being a good runner, I caught up with him and grabbed him. Next thing I knew, I was on the ground with a policeman yelling in my ear. The guy got away. FML

#20764590
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50585) - you deserved it (2933)

On 07/05/2013 at 2:11am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was at Walmart. A guy in a mobility scooter bumped into me, then told me to "get the fuck out of the way." When I told him to watch his mouth, he got up and shoved me into a shelf. Just a few minutes prior, he'd yelled that he was paralyzed from the waist down. FML

#20797503
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44220) - you deserved it (2923)

On 07/22/2013 at 12:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, the family I live with decided that beer is a more important purchase than the things we need, such as detergent, soap, and toilet paper, just to name a few things. Apparently, paper towels should suffice. FML

Today, I went to the pool. As I started going up the steps to use the water slide, a kid no older than 10 yanked my swim trunks down to "see what's down there." FML

Today, my husband managed to set fire to half of our garden setting up mosquito repellents. FML

#20802186
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35492) - you deserved it (2892)

On 07/25/2013 at 12:10am - misc - by how (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my husband's recent obsession with The Sopranos since James Gandolfini died went a step further into the ridiculous, when he tried to encourage some ducks to land in our swimming pool by throwing loaves of bread into it, while bellowing at them with a 'Noo Joisey' Wise Guy accent. FML

#20770230
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29423) - you deserved it (2887)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:57am - misc - by Not Mrs Soprano (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I called an airline to try to locate a bag I left on a flight. When I told the phone rep which airport I flew into, he asked me what city it was in. He paused after I told him, then asked me what state Seattle is in. I don't think I'll be getting my bag back. FML

#20798415
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38124) - you deserved it (2879)

On 07/22/2013 at 10:18pm - misc - by 1942ford (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, as I was about to enter a public restroom, a man walked out and said, "You may want to hold your nose in there. I just took the biggest dump of my life." It was the ladies' restroom. FML

#20785565
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43811) - you deserved it (2861)

On 07/16/2013 at 12:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I spontaneously got my ear pierced. By spontaneously, I mean my 12-year-old sister stabbed one of her earrings into my ear while I was sleeping. She claimed the freckle on my earlobe looks "exactly the same" as the hole from her ear piercing. FML

#20801253
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43119) - you deserved it (2852)

On 07/24/2013 at 2:03pm - kids - by ouch - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to wake my mom up. While she was naked. On the toilet. FML

Today, I was told that I have to apply to keep the job that I've held for the past two years. There are so many other applicants that it's basically a free-for-all. FML

#20813366
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38955) - you deserved it (2819)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:47pm - work - by TheStressComesFree (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and my best friend making out. She claimed he was just tasting her lipstick. FML

#20784153
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46118) - you deserved it (2815)

On 07/15/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by leeceetaylor99 - United States (Texas)

Today, I went camping with my family. While I was using the shower house, my sister decided it'd be hilarious to run off with my clothes and towel. I ran back to the camper, completely naked, only for my parents to bitch me out for streaking. FML

#20803187
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39480) - you deserved it (2749)

On 07/25/2013 at 4:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)



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