Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML

#20751757
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47684) - you deserved it (2692)

On 06/28/2013 at 1:16am - health - by not cool (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I received 5 missed calls from a florist stating that they were having problems delivering a bouquet from my ex. I was thrilled at the idea of a reconciliation. Turns out however that he just got mine and his new girlfriend's phone numbers confused. FML

#20747907
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33801) - you deserved it (2689)

On 06/26/2013 at 3:09am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my boss threatened to fire me for showing up at work early. His reasoning is that it looks bad when his workers show up before dawn and work later than he does. He assigned me these hours specifically to accommodate one of our clients. FML

#20725768
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40156) - you deserved it (2668)

On 06/14/2013 at 3:29pm - work - by wtfwhyfml (woman) - United States

Today, I helped an elderly lady put a bookshelf in her car. She then thanked me by hitting me with her car as she drove out of the parking lot. FML

#20736007
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35940) - you deserved it (2622)

On 06/19/2013 at 9:09pm - work - by anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my drunk dad decided to wake me up by lobbing our cat directly into my now-mauled face. FML

#20739340
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37841) - you deserved it (2610)

On 06/21/2013 at 4:38pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, the stalker flatmate who has been obsessed with me since I first moved into the flat two years ago, graduated. Apparently he told everyone we are an item, because his parents and relatives were smiling and taking pictures of me from their seats two rows ahead of mine at the ceremony. FML

Today, I woke up to my bratty younger sister cutting through my hair with a pair of scissors. I now look like a freak, and my mum bitched me out for being angry, all because my sister claimed she'd been sleep-walking. Her demented smirk said otherwise. FML

#20729503
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46600) - you deserved it (2582)

On 06/16/2013 at 2:49pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I rescued a little boy who looked like he was drowning in a public pool. His mother then smacked me in the face for "touching him". FML

#20708781
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43580) - you deserved it (2580)

On 06/06/2013 at 12:13am - kids - by butisavedyourkid - United States

Today, I met my biological father for the first time. He seemed to be slightly intoxicated from the outset, and less than half an hour later, he had tried to intimidate me into "loaning" him several hundred euros for reasons he wouldn't tell me. So long, "dad". FML

#20750358
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40475) - you deserved it (2539)

On 06/27/2013 at 1:35pm - misc - by brigitte (woman) - France (Picardie)

Today, after working at my job for months, I quit. Why? My boss tried to convince me that we are in a secret relationship after he told me he loved me. FML

#20751768
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39277) - you deserved it (2528)

On 06/28/2013 at 1:23am - work - by unknown relationship - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was sitting at my favorite coffee shop, when a creepy 50-ish looking guy sat at my table. He asked if I'm into submissive guys, and if I wanted to dominate him. I'm a 17-year-old girl, and am now scared to ever go back there. FML

#20754256
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42596) - you deserved it (2507)

On 06/29/2013 at 1:18pm - misc - by perdix??? (woman) - Czech Republic

Today, my neighbor knocked on my door to borrow my laundry room key. He was bare-ass naked. When I refused to open the door, he tried to break it down. I had to call the police before he would leave. FML

Today, I was looking forward to my only day to sleep-in this month while I'm balancing school and work. I was rudely awakened at 6 am by my sister and her friend trying to make pancakes, burning them, and setting off the fire alarm in my house for half an hour. FML

#20720351
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40185) - you deserved it (2492)

On 06/11/2013 at 9:16pm - misc - by Elephant1718 - United States (Oregon)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: