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May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my mom came back from a major surgery. She also had a yeast infection. I had to push the applicator in because she couldn't bend down. This cannot be unfelt. FML

#20641584
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49772) - you deserved it (3035)

On 05/04/2013 at 7:26pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was leaving my doctor's appointment when a nurse stopped me. She exclaimed, "Wow you are so skinny! What's your secret?" My secret? Having an autoimmune disease. FML

Today, I was at the supermarket when an elderly lady asked if I'd grab some coffee for her from a high shelf. The moment I took my hands off my almost-full shopping cart, she made off with it. I ended up getting thrown out by security after she claimed I was trying to steal it from her. FML

#20661009
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42301) - you deserved it (3017)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML

#20668592
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47170) - you deserved it (3013)

On 05/17/2013 at 5:25am - misc - by Jololol - United States

Today, I heard my grandma sobbing in her room. After finally convincing her to tell me what was wrong, she confessed to watching a porn video last night. She thinks not being able to sleep afterwards is a sign that God is punishing her, and that she's damned our family to hell. FML

#20681811
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41147) - you deserved it (3012)

On 05/23/2013 at 1:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Buzau)

Today, in the middle of our one year anniversary dinner, my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend showed up declaring her love for him. They left together and I had to take the bus home. FML

#20693929
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58140) - you deserved it (3002)

On 05/29/2013 at 8:39pm - love - by anonymoose - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I listened to my elderly bachelor neighbor moan, "Oh, kitty, kitty, kitty! Oh kitty!" for over half-an-hour before he wandered out on his balcony in wet, tight white underwear to water his plant. This is the fifth time this week, and I still don't know what on earth he's doing. FML

#20675279
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39637) - you deserved it (2997)

On 05/20/2013 at 11:56am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was stuck in my apartment complex's elevator. I was shouting out for help when a voice came screaming, "This is the fire department." I was relieved until he said, "Just kidding." FML

#20681121
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46118) - you deserved it (2990)

On 05/23/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by Mylifesucks - United States (Kentucky)

Today, and throughout the past week, my electricity, water, cable, and Internet were progressively shut off. Why? Because my deranged mother-in-law has been stealing the money orders I use to pay my bills out of my mailbox. She also stole the late notices because she didn't want me to be "mad". FML

#20678301
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46975) - you deserved it (2989)

On 05/21/2013 at 6:47pm - money - by LightsOut - United States (Florida)

Today, I got a picture message from my aunt that said, "9 out of 10 kids get their awesomeness from their aunt." Normally, I would have agreed, except she forgot my birthday yesterday. FML

#20677224
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36504) - you deserved it (2988)

On 05/21/2013 at 3:32am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, a woman approached me in the street and slapped me, ranting about how I stole her man. I don't even know her man, or her, and I live over a thousand miles away in Scotland. I'm back in town for the first time since my childhood to attend a wedding. FML

#20661106
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47294) - you deserved it (2954)

On 05/13/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by culodegrillo (woman) - Spain

Today, my ex-wife, whom I divorced just 8 months ago, asked me to attend her wedding, because "it would mean a lot" to her. She's marrying the man she cheated on me with. FML

#20651917
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49318) - you deserved it (2946)

On 05/09/2013 at 12:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after months of tests for mystery nerve pain, I went to get more blood taken only to leave the clinic with an empty tin to collect my bowel movements for the next 72 hours. Which needs to be refrigerated. I live with 4 other people, with one fridge. FML

#20688590
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44622) - you deserved it (2926)

On 05/27/2013 at 1:05am - health - by you're shitting me - Australia



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