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Sunday 2 March 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I ran into a friend I hadn't seen in a while, but I had heard she was pregnant. I rubbed her belly and asked when she was due. She slowly backed away, giving me a weird look and said, "Two months ago." FML

Today, I tried to kill a spider by throwing a shoe at it. All it did was slice the spider's egg sac open, releasing all its babies. FML

#21076106
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56072) - you deserved it (14533)

On 03/02/2014 at 5:38pm - animals - by Anonytard - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got my first massage. At the end, the masseuse made a gesture indicating which way the exit was. After having had her hands all over my body for the past hour, I thought the gesture was indicative of a goodbye hug. Things got awkward really fast. FML

#21076286
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37863) - you deserved it (8632)

On 03/02/2014 at 9:30pm - misc - by AlwaysAwkward - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was shopping for dresses when my fiancé turned into what I can only call a groomzilla. He told me and my maid of honor that we need to lose weight because he's not "paying all this money for a pair of fatties to not look good." FML

#21075933
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47153) - you deserved it (7242)

On 03/02/2014 at 2:09pm - money - by Ms. Piggy (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out that my lover and boyfriend of over 5 years has me listed in his contacts as "Vagina". FML

#21075644
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50809) - you deserved it (7090)

On 03/02/2014 at 3:44am - love - by ouch (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I set up a small social gathering for a few friends. One of them didn't have a ride, so the others, who'd already shown up, went to go give him a ride. After no sign of them for a whole hour, I called to see what was wrong. They went out to eat and completely forgot about me. FML

#21075503
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47549) - you deserved it (4259)

On 03/02/2014 at 12:03am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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