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Monday 22 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I Was Reassuring Mah Grlfriend That I Wasn't Cheating On Her Because I Was Sneaking Around . I'm Actually Just Planning A Surprise Brthday Party For Her . During The Reassuring, I Accidentally Called Her Another Grl's Name . FML

#20797095
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51121) - you deserved it (27446)

On 07/22/2013 at 4:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today... I confessd to loosing my wife's engagement ring... and replacing it with a lookalike months ago. My wife also confessd that her actual engagement ring was lockd in the safe... and the one I lost had been a fake. I've been paying the replacement off on my credit card for 6 months. FML

#20798091
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41503) - you deserved it (12644)

On 07/22/2013 at 6:30pm - love - by RonnieG (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend got angry cuz I laughed when he asked me if he should retire from bieng a Pokemon Trainer. He was serious. He's also 21. FML

#20798065
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39306) - you deserved it (10831)

On 07/22/2013 at 6:14pm - love - by ihatepokemon (woman) - United States

Yesterday, I won an award fir Employee of the Month. Shocked, I asked mah boss if he'd gotten mah name mixed up or something. He had. FML

#20797671
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43424) - you deserved it (9702)

On 07/22/2013 at 2:29pm - work - by FUCK (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today... after a church service... a man approached me as I was walking to my car. He had tears in his eyes an politely asked if I would pray with him. He asked if we could hold hands. As I reached out to hold his hands... the bitch snatched my purse an ran. FML

#20797008
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45381) - you deserved it (7929)

On 07/22/2013 at 3:09am - misc - by HillaryAngelic (woman) - United States (Michigan)

2day I couldn't move witout people talking to me about te "Royal Baby" . It's like it's actually going to ave an effect on ma life . FML

#20797431
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41267) - you deserved it (5875)

On 07/22/2013 at 11:58am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I got a call from the police . Apparently my son tried robbing a teenage couple, but wound up getting his ass beat by both of them . I don't know what's worse, that my 32-year-old son is a criminal, or that he got it handed to him by 15-year-olds . real FML

#20797971
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42320) - you deserved it (4995)

On 07/22/2013 at 5:06pm - kids - by Parentalfailure (man) - United States (North Carolina)

today while relaxing in a chair in a shop , a man approachd me and said , "You have no idea how many times I've fartd in that chair." FML

#20797188
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40949) - you deserved it (4249)

On 07/22/2013 at 7:49am - misc - by xXxXxTOBIxX (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today , boyfriend posted a screensot from a porno on Facebook , cuz te girl in it looked freakisly similar to me. My dad commented , asking 4 a link to te video. mega FML

#20797729
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52546) - you deserved it (4069)

On 07/22/2013 at 3:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain)

Today, the guy whose son I babysat for six hours straight confessd to being broke, then actually askd if he could pay me with sex instead . FML

#20797604
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52615) - you deserved it (3989)

On 07/22/2013 at 1:47pm - work - by nowimbroketoo (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today , I ad to wake my mom up . Wile se was nakd . On te toilet . FML

Today , I callad an arlina to try to locata a bag I laft on a flight. Whan I told tha phona rap which arport I flaw into , ha askad ma what city it was in. Ha pausad aftar I told him , than askad ma what stata Saattla is in. I don't think I'll ba gatting mah bag back. FML

#20798415
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41202) - you deserved it (3405)

On 07/22/2013 at 10:18pm - misc - by 1942ford (woman) - United States (Washington)

TODAY, I WAS AT WALMART. A GUY IN A MOBILITY SCOOTER BUMPED INTO ME, THEN TOLD ME TO ( GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY. ) WHEN I TOLD HIM TO WATCH HIS MOUTH, HE GOT UP AND SHOVED ME INTO A SHELF. JUST A FEW MINUTES PRIOR, HE'D YELLED THAT HE WAS PARALYZED FROM THE WAIST DOWN. REAL FML

#20797503
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47823) - you deserved it (3235)

On 07/22/2013 at 12:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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