Choose the period

Choose a category

Agreed
Commented
Favorited

Today, my friend sent me a link to a "horrible" tattoo that he found online, that a guy had gotten at my tattoo parlor. FML

by Bad Artist / 05/07/2014 at 10:55am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a bird that had fallen from its nest, so I made a new nest for it in a shoebox and put it as close to the old one as possible. When I checked back on it later, all I found was a chewed-up corpse. FML

by KHAAAAA-RMA!! / 05/10/2014 at 5:32pm / United States / Animals

Today, my landlord's control issue got out of control when I got a call telling me I have "too much stuff" and have to move out of the apartment. I sold all my furniture when I moved in and all I currently own is a scratch post, a chair and a pair of curtains. FML

by that makes me a sad panda / 05/19/2014 at 5:44pm / Sweden (Vasterbottens Lan) / Money

Today, it was my birthday. The only person who remembered was my dad who got me a phone charger for my car, which I didn't even need because he got me the same exact thing last year. FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2014 at 3:24am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a guy I had been casually seeing asked me to dinner. Thinking he could be wanting to make things serious, I got all dressed up. Turns out he got a girlfriend and just wanted to tell me in person to avoid things being awkward. We then waited in silence for our meal. FML

by moneybenny / 06/07/2014 at 6:17am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I started my job as a driving instructor. My first client showed up piss drunk. FML

by Anonymous / 06/14/2014 at 8:34pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I opened my window due to the good weather. I was lucky enough to listen to the sounds of someone violently throwing up for over an hour. The window got stuck open. FML

by Anonymous / 07/02/2014 at 8:59pm / Health

Today, I was finally given a parking spot at work. It turns out to be between an expensive sports car that never parks straight and a giant truck too big for its space. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2014 at 7:57pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, my friends came over to my house to eat my food and make fun of me as they played on my Xbox. FML

by iAmJasper / 09/17/2014 at 5:56pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, marks yet again another day that I've been asked if I'm autistic. No, that's just my Korean accent. Apparently I look "too white" to have one. FML

by notautistic / 09/25/2014 at 9:15pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was the weird girl on the city bus who falls asleep then makes a loud, weird noise and wakes herself up. FML

by pyrogypsy / 10/23/2014 at 9:05pm / United States (Washington) / Transportation

Today, I found out that the "IRS scam" that I ignored last week was actually not a scam, and now I have a warrant out for me. FML

by dawg / 12/14/2014 at 10:50pm / United States (Florida) / Money

Today, when making a delivery for the restaurant I work for, a customer shoved and yelled at me because she didn't get any fries with her order. She didn't order any, which isn't unusual, considering we're a Chinese takeaway and don't even sell them. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2015 at 8:25pm / Australia (Queensland) / Work