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Today, I had to endure my father going on a sexist rant about how women shouldn't be allowed to go to university because it's "unrealistic" since "all women" become stay-at-home mums. This is the same man who threatened to kick me out if I dropped out of uni. FML

#21299878
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31891) - you deserved it (2623)

On 11/15/2014 at 10:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I was talking to my boss about dogs and cats. I'm a dog person; he's a cat person. He told me that he likes cats better, because they are laid back and don't do anything all day. Before I could stop myself, I blurted out, "Just like you?" FML

#21188385
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37111) - you deserved it (25271)

On 06/25/2014 at 8:20pm - work - by Respect101 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I mixed up my chapstick and cork grease. Now my clarinet smells like cherries, and my lips smell like a gym floor. FML

#21340194
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28909) - you deserved it (6332)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I met an American guy at a bar. I felt flattered when he said, "You know what they say about Swedish girls, all so beautiful." After a pause, he filled in with, "What the fuck happened to you?" FML

Today, someone tried to break into my dorm room while I was in class. Ramming the metal door with their shoulder just dented it, so they pissed on my welcome mat and left. FML

#21331929
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30311) - you deserved it (2189)

On 01/06/2015 at 9:10am - misc - by rimenrezon (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend kept jiggling my fat rolls while we were cuddling. I was annoyed, and I told him he could at least go for my boobs instead. He instantly replied, "But these are bigger..." FML

#21293369
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35113) - you deserved it (7646)

On 11/06/2014 at 12:14pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom told me to take out the trash. I thought it would be a good idea to Hulk-smash it into the can. I missed. The bag ripped and garbage flew everywhere. FML

#21192717
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21319) - you deserved it (55200)

On 06/29/2014 at 4:37pm - misc - by whoops (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I parked my motorcycle in a parking spot. When I came back, my bike had been moved and was laying on its side with a note saying, "Sorry I dropped your motorcycle I was trying to move it forward so I could park my car because there weren't any other spots." FML

#21197788
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48969) - you deserved it (6223)

On 07/03/2014 at 9:30pm - misc - by AJL - United States

Today, I ran one of the hardest cross-country courses in the country. I'm a pretty good runner, and I was feeling confident for the first mile. Then the chipotle from last night's dinner hit, and my legs weren't the only thing running. FML

#21257129
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37785) - you deserved it (9074)

On 09/12/2014 at 8:19pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she's afraid of my ex-wife. This is the third one in a row to use that very reason. The judge still won't accept my pleas for a restraining order. FML

#21333809
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33529) - you deserved it (2171)

On 01/09/2015 at 6:43am - love - by swimfaned - United States

Today, my car was stolen from my driveway. I reported it to the police, the insurance company, and my neighbors, and begged for help via social media. As I walked to catch a bus, I saw my car parked outside my school. I forgot I left it there last night. FML

#21256874
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20813) - you deserved it (41688)

On 09/12/2014 at 10:32am - misc - by uppiskalle - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I had to grip the headboard of my bed for the first time in months. I wasn't having incredible sex unfortunately, just really bad gas. FML

#21203235
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45017) - you deserved it (6300)

On 07/08/2014 at 7:37pm - intimacy - by HeartToFart - United States (Florida)

Today, I began to sign "I love you" to my boyfriend from across the room. I ended up just poking myself in the eye. FML

#21238728
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32853) - you deserved it (8022)

On 08/16/2014 at 2:20am - love - by Hopeless romantic (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)



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