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Today, I fell asleep during my division emergency meeting. As I about to head home that evening, my boss patted me on the back saying "Wrong move. Good luck". Turned out, it was a meeting to determine who will be kicked out of the company due to recession. My name was written first on the list. FML

#5562258
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8231) - you deserved it (52234)

On 09/30/2009 at 5:03am - work - by Unemployed (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, after pulling an all-nighter for my Bio final at 8AM and drinking 6 sodas, 3 energy drinks, and coffee throughout the night, an hour into the exam, I had to go to the restroom, so I get permission and go. I'm 1 of 3 people. They later find a cheat sheet in the restroom. Now I'm a suspect. FML

#6716496
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31170) - you deserved it (4132)

On 12/12/2009 at 12:00am - misc - by fuckbio (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my 4 year old daughter was ripping out photos of the family photo book, I asked her why she was doing it she answered, "I saw mummy doing it to another book." The only other family photo book was the day we got married. FML

#7140982
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27310) - you deserved it (2763)

On 01/04/2010 at 3:50am - misc - by Michael (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while at work I went to use the public restroom because I had a severe case of diarrhea. All went well until the timed sensor lights went off and I couldn't leave my stall to get them back on. I sat there for thirty minutes in pure darkness. FML

#7105226
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25926) - you deserved it (3736)

On 01/02/2010 at 2:24pm - work - by Bathroom Problems - France

Today, I read through my phone, hoping there weren't any drunk texts by me from the night before. Apparently I dirty texted everyone, even my boss. FML

#7255903
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7286) - you deserved it (37400)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:11am - misc - by ishouldntdrink (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the dentist. I got a new dentist who started out a conversation about school. She asked where I went to school and if I liked my principal. After I told her I thought he was full of himself, she said she was married to him. FML

#11497939
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37035) - you deserved it (9606)

On 06/27/2010 at 2:54pm - work - by Matt (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, it's officially been two weeks since I found out I have mono. It's also been two weeks since anyone has visited me, called me, or even emailed me. The real kicker? I'm now fired from my job because they can't believe I can have mono twice in one year. I guess I'm just lucky that way. FML

#7770242
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29377) - you deserved it (3582)

On 02/01/2010 at 1:43am - health - by blah - Sent from mobile version

Today, while parking my car, I accidentally bumped into the car in front of me, making a small, barely noticeable dent. I felt bad, wrote an apology note, and stuck it on his windshield. An hour later, he replied by keying the entire right side of my car. FML

#14162371
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28835) - you deserved it (10079)

On 12/11/2010 at 2:40am - misc - by immunizations - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, it's my birthday, and the only person that called me was my boss. He wants me to cover his shift tonight. FML

#13448275
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34797) - you deserved it (2925)

On 10/14/2010 at 6:10pm - work - by unloved - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I found out that being rushed unconscious to the hospital and missing work qualifies you for termination if you don't call in, even if you have a note from the ER doctor. FML

#14246241
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33129) - you deserved it (2278)

On 12/18/2010 at 10:10am - work - by pissedexworker (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I called my dad at his new wife's house to inform him I was all set to graduate from community college with my associates degree and that we needed to sit down and plan how to pay for the 4 year degree. To which he replied "all a girl needs is an associates degree". Thanks dad. FML

#9182520
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31283) - you deserved it (4651)

On 03/18/2010 at 8:20am - money - by Anna (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I learned that if you don't wrap your hair around a bristled curling iron the correct way, you end up getting it stuck, not to mention frying it. Three inches of my hair is now in the trash. FML

Today, a few friends and I ran through sprinklers at our school until we were all soaked. Then we were told that they put fertilizer in the water. I'm soaked in manure. Now I know why it tasted weird. FML

#10777630
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12089) - you deserved it (40185)

On 05/26/2010 at 2:35pm - misc - by noraidk - United States (Texas)



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