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Today, finally we got our toddler daughter to sleep in her own bed. The wife and I were both excited to finally have our room to ourselves. Just as our daughter was about to fall asleep, the damn cat went into her room and loudly hacked up a huge hairball. Now she's back in mommy's and daddy's bed. FML

#10725342
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30425) - you deserved it (6710)

On 05/24/2010 at 12:14am - kids - by blahblah - United States (New York)

Today, I was reading a magazine while straightening my hair. I got really into this one article until suddenly a huge clump of hair fell on it. I looked up and realized I had burned through the layer of hair I was straightening, leaving me with one layer at ear length and the rest at bra length. FML

#10512459
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9094) - you deserved it (45439)

On 05/13/2010 at 7:31pm - misc - by errints234234 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my car was stolen. I got it back later without the engine, any of the wheels or my brand new radio and speakers. They even took my car mats. FML

#13323289
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29498) - you deserved it (2355)

On 10/04/2010 at 10:39pm - misc - by Ro (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I hit a car while trying to park. Assuming that no one saw, I moved my car and parked somewhere else. Hours later I get a call from the university police. While backing up to go to the police station I hit another car. FML

#14150580
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7225) - you deserved it (53369)

On 12/10/2010 at 3:12am - misc - by eyeleanify (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I sent a text to a guy I'd met over the weekend. He'd traveled 40 miles to my town for the date, so I picked up the tab for dinner. My text simply said, "Had a nice time. Looking forward to getting together again." His reply was, "When did you get so needy?" FML

#13898275
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29998) - you deserved it (3668)

On 11/19/2010 at 10:00am - love - by needfulthing - United States

Today, while standing in line at a local Mexican fast food place, I was feeling generous and let a little kid behind me go in front. Turns out he had a list, and was ordering food for his whole family. I had to wait 30 minutes to get my food. FML

#14162375
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27336) - you deserved it (12965)

On 12/11/2010 at 2:41am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was on the bus. I heard a click right before something small hit my cheek. I looked over to see the lady next to me cutting her long, dirty fingernails. The bus was too crowded to move and It was a 20 minute ride to work. FML

#15004070
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28302) - you deserved it (2432)

On 02/16/2011 at 4:08pm - misc - by clips (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, during a snowstorm, I opened my car door to get out. The wind snapped it wide open, then immediately changed course and swung it back at me just as I stepped out, spilling an entire hot cup of coffee all over me. FML

#14809885
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27611) - you deserved it (4201)

On 02/02/2011 at 9:44am - misc - by Biggie (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had my girlfriend drive me to go buy a motorcycle. I rode it 50 minutes home, got in the drive way, put the kick stand down, and then lost my balance and fell on the other side. I paid $3000 to drop it in the first hour and break the turn signal off. FML

#15755743
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21374) - you deserved it (23540)

On 04/12/2011 at 1:45pm - misc - by scottskidee - United States (Ohio)

Today, for our last kid-free dinner before the birth of our 4th child, we chose a Japanese hibachi restaurant. They sat us with a family with a toddler, who started screaming at the first flame trick, causing the chef to cease to do anything entertaining. FML

#15267511
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32916) - you deserved it (4342)

On 03/10/2011 at 9:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, it was my first day as a vacuum salesman. While I was demonstrating how well it removed stains, I managed to smear stuff over the area I was cleaning. So not only was I unsuccessful in removing the original stains, I left them with worse carpet than when I got there. FML

#18451587
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10332) - you deserved it (27110)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:29am - work - by JB - United States

Today, my car got broken into. A small folded plastic bag and a few toothpicks I got from a restaurant were stolen. It's going to cost me a few hundred bucks to fix and clean my car over a 10 cent bag and a few free toothpicks. FML

#20543135
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31799) - you deserved it (2486)

On 03/14/2013 at 4:52am - money - by ScrewedForCheapBag - United States (California)

Today, I got my wedding photos back from my sister, a "professional" photographer who offered to do our wedding as a gift. It turns out that not only did she not catch most of the ceremony or reception, but all of the outdoor photos feature a large garbage bag in the background. FML



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