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Today, my dog played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML

#20991879
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36980) - you deserved it (6350)

On 12/14/2013 at 12:05am - animals - by Crystal_Nicole - United States (Kansas)

Today, my grandkids went around my house claiming items to inherit. FML

#20984796
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50810) - you deserved it (3801)

On 12/08/2013 at 8:19am - kids - by blah! - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I diagnosed a patient with a spastic colon. For some reason, the term "spastic colon" has always amused me, and I burst into uncontrollable laughter as I said it. By the time I managed to stop laughing, my eyes were watering and my patient was visibly angry. FML

#21002747
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21008) - you deserved it (43590)

On 12/23/2013 at 6:11pm - work - by dr immature (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML

#20982965
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51198) - you deserved it (5336)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I asked my girlfriend what she loves the most about me. She said it's the fact that I look like her cousin. FML

#20984907
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45315) - you deserved it (3713)

On 12/08/2013 at 11:49am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found a credit card at my job. As store policy goes, we have to cut up lost cards immediately after finding them to protect the cardholders. As I grab the scissors and cut, my manager calls out, "Has anyone seen my credit card?" FML

#20988740
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45516) - you deserved it (10655)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:33am - work - by mariology (man) - United States (Delaware)

Today, Christmas changed my life. Last year I had a boyfriend to cuddle with on Christmas; this year I have a body pillow of an anime character. FML

#21004509
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39059) - you deserved it (6818)

On 12/25/2013 at 2:46am - love - by lonely otaku (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me via Facebook. I cared more about the spelling mistakes he made than the actual message. FML

#20994896
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37960) - you deserved it (10949)

On 12/16/2013 at 5:43pm - love - by dana (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out the money my husband's been funneling from our bank account wasn't for drugs or gifts for another girl like I thought. It was for a guy he stupidly believed was a foreign diplomat, who supposedly needed to bribe officials in order to send us several million dollars. FML

#20997988
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40261) - you deserved it (3938)

On 12/19/2013 at 12:20pm - money - by you fucking idiot (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend said he was in love with my best friend instead of me. I wouldn't be so upset if it wasn't the third boyfriend in a row this happened with. FML

#20997702
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51963) - you deserved it (4491)

On 12/19/2013 at 1:13am - love - by hot_friend (woman) - United States

Today, I learned, 90 horrifying minutes into a college exam, that my 85-year-old calculus teacher had spent the last three weeks teaching us the wrong chapter. FML

#20997770
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45673) - you deserved it (2768)

On 12/19/2013 at 4:09am - work - by wasted time - United States

Today, I went on a 70-mile drive to the next town over to finally meet this beautiful girl I had talked to online. To my surprise, she looked exactly how she did in her pictures, minus the ring on her finger and the fiancé who wanted to punch me in the face. FML

#21006475
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41886) - you deserved it (5392)

On 12/26/2013 at 6:57pm - love - by William Johnson - United States (Alaska)

Today, my 19-year-old brother subjected me to yet another rant about how the writers of My Little Pony aren't writing the show for people like him any more, the "true fans", otherwise known as pimply-faced adults who don't use deodorant and only shower once a week. FML

#21007374
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36369) - you deserved it (4115)

On 12/27/2013 at 3:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



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