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Today, I went to see Terminator. Not wanting to spend an outrageous amount of money at the concession stand, I sneaked a Dr. Pepper into the theater. I thought I had gotten away with it, until I opened the bottle and it exploded all over me and four other people that I didn't know. FML

#2298945
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12712) - you deserved it (47732)

On 05/26/2009 at 12:51am - misc - by embarrassed (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to sit for an hour listening to my girlfriend talk to her ex about his testicles. She laughed more during that conversation than she ever has with me. FML

#5015419
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37637) - you deserved it (5623)

On 09/03/2009 at 3:23am - love - by aftermath1991 (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I went to see my guidance counselor. I was supposed to hear from my college about a scholarship by October 3rd. I was worried since it was already the 2nd so I went to talk to her. She never turned in my nomination. Goodbye $80,000 scholarship. FML

#5615281
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49125) - you deserved it (2786)

On 10/03/2009 at 12:37am - misc - by Screwed (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, a friend asked me if I could help him set up the stage for his wedding. Feeling honored that he considered me a close enough friend to aid him on his special day, I agreed to help. Turns out we aren't so close. I was asked to leave after I was done because I hadn't actually been invited. FML

#4099565
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48850) - you deserved it (2379)

On 07/28/2009 at 2:34am - misc - by partypooper (man) - United States (California)

Today, there was a fire alarm in my dorm. Just as I was leaving my room, a lady in the hallway told me that it was a drill and they'd be inspecting rooms, so I would need to leave my door unlocked. When I came back, my room was trashed and my laptop, speakers, and jewelry were gone. FML

#5406145
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36351) - you deserved it (14962)

On 09/21/2009 at 11:19pm - misc - by zzyx (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me. Via text. With the iPhone I got him for our anniversary. FML

#5601325
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35760) - you deserved it (3537)

On 10/02/2009 at 7:31am - misc - by SezzyJ - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I just let out all my feeling for a woman that I have loved for 22 years. When I finished she said "You're so funny" and walked away. FML

#5835867
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33763) - you deserved it (6031)

On 10/14/2009 at 9:48pm - love - by diskdude13 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, there was an earthquake. Good news: the only damage was a tree fell on some losers car. Bad news: that loser was me. FML

#5999708
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31124) - you deserved it (2813)

On 10/25/2009 at 11:14pm - misc - by Jo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at work I wrote up my boyfriend (whom I've been secretly dating, because I'm his supervisor) for being $40 short on his register. Our policy is to write up anyone short over $10. He got mad and told my boss we're dating, and I was instantly fired. Then I got dumped for being a "tattle-tale". FML

#6175631
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28327) - you deserved it (16701)

On 11/05/2009 at 10:43pm - work - by supervisor (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, for my art project, I spent hours painting my whole body in black spots with acrylic paint. I then went and stood outside in the snow, naked, so I could take pictures of it. Only then to find out the camera was out of batteries. FML

#7197887
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8569) - you deserved it (32369)

On 01/07/2010 at 11:36am - misc - by Boob (woman) - United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead)

Today, I had to go to court to see whether my drivers license is suspended for an entire year. I woke up early, went to court, and everything went perfectly, with all the charges being dropped. Unfortunately, I then woke up, and am now going to be late. FML

#7437727
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12107) - you deserved it (27901)

On 01/19/2010 at 2:38pm - misc - by haus (man) - United States (California)

Today, while working at my new job at a veterinary hospital, I was excited that I set a urinary catheter in a dog for the first time. I guess I was a little too enthusiastic though, because I pulled it out too fast and bloody urine splashed up all over my face. FML

#8336704
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8022) - you deserved it (29930)

On 02/16/2010 at 11:43am - work - by alex (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found that my "lesbian" best friend and roommate is now dating the guy I've been trying to get a date with for weeks. FML

#13829911
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29860) - you deserved it (3079)

On 11/13/2010 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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