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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I confronted my boyfriend after I found him cheating on me with my best friend. It ended up with me apologising for spying on him. FML

#21293948
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36785) - you deserved it (17818)

On 11/07/2014 at 7:28am - love - by Turnaround (woman) -

Today, I wore what I thought was a hideous sweater from the thrift store for an ugly sweater contest. I've gotten more compliments on it than anything else I've ever worn. I can't even succeed at failure. FML

#21315542
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30982) - you deserved it (3693)

On 12/11/2014 at 11:10am - work - by anyoldnamewilldo (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, the kid I was tutoring told me that "pirates were a myth. Like the Greeks and Romans." He's 16. FML

#21349360
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35071) - you deserved it (2688)

On 02/03/2015 at 10:39pm - misc - by FrustratedTutor - United States (Kansas)

Today, as I was riding my bike home from school, I saw a homeless man sitting on a bench. I was about to walk up to him and give him money, but before I could do anything my mother walked up and kissed him. My mom is dating this guy. FML

#21368890
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37608) - you deserved it (3234)

On 03/05/2015 at 8:38pm - love - by Not Homeless - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got trapped in my building's elevator for over an hour, with my dog who I had been rushing outside with because he had explosive diarrhea. FML

#21391716
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35682) - you deserved it (2842)

On 04/11/2015 at 8:12am - animals - by Crappy - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I complimented a player in a game who protected my ass the whole match. As a joke, I told them to marry me. Turned out the person was a horny 40-something lesbian stalker who spent the next 5 hours sending me pictures and trying to find out where I live. FML

#21398988
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29579) - you deserved it (5976)

On 04/24/2015 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my sister told me she found my escaped tarantula and put it in a box on my bed. I never had a tarantula, and the box was empty when I checked. FML

#21409835
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30924) - you deserved it (2452)

On 05/14/2015 at 1:11am - animals - by cricketsins (woman) - United States

Today, my portfolio manager called me and said he had invested all of my retirement in Circuit City. FML

#1021
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35697) - you deserved it (2946)

On 01/13/2009 at 5:06am - money - by Noname - United States (Virginia)

Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML

#6627
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47184) - you deserved it (2026)

On 02/03/2009 at 4:46pm - money - by fire0fisis - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I rolled over a curb and bent one of the signs that read "Please Park Here After Your Road Test," at the DMV, because my foot slipped off the brake just before I put the car in park, which would've ended my Test. The first words out of the examiner's mouth were, "Well you would've passed." FML

#121657
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21803) - you deserved it (30479)

On 02/24/2009 at 6:02am - misc - by ouagadougou (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was shopping at Shoppers Drug Mart with my mom. As we pulled up to the cashier, I noticed it was a really hot girl from my school. Trying to be cool, I told my mom that I'll be paying for the purchases. My debit card was denied. My mom had to pay. FML

#2658962
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12286) - you deserved it (58694)

On 06/06/2009 at 12:23pm - misc - by Goki (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I fell down the stairs and broke my arm. I went into hospital to get it put in a cast, but still went into school afterwards. I got written up for truancy because I didn't have a doctor's note. The cast was still on my arm. FML

#5328146
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40276) - you deserved it (3195)

On 09/18/2009 at 4:06am - misc - by London (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I decided to check my email on our family computer. Since my dad's account was already logged on, I chose to use his instead of logging on my own. When opening up a new page and seeing his recently viewed sites, I learned that he loves to watch porn. I also learned he has a foot fetish. FML

#4172225
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32884) - you deserved it (18725)

On 07/30/2009 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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