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Today, was my birthday. Today was also the day that my mom's cat died four years ago. She was too busy crying and looking at old photos of her beloved cat to even wish me a happy birthday. FML

#20444416
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26053) - you deserved it (2021)

On 01/06/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Birthday girl (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, my girlfriend returned home from a several week vacation with family. Instead of a happy reunion, I was terribly emasculated, publicly, for bringing flowers that "weren't as pretty as all the other couples' in baggage claim." FML

#20458802
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33018) - you deserved it (3243)

On 01/14/2013 at 10:47am - misc - by badenoughflowers - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend gave me lingerie from Victoria's Secret. He then added that his mother picked it out. FML

#20459473
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29816) - you deserved it (3109)

On 01/14/2013 at 7:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, a state trooper ticketed me after learning I was ticketed for the same offense an hour earlier, namely driving with a broken headlight. The good news is that both tickets will be dismissed if I go to court. The bad news is that I'd have to go to different courthouses at the same time of day. FML

#20494464
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28790) - you deserved it (3741)

On 02/05/2013 at 1:59pm - money - by halfmypaycheckgone (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I met with my Bolivian friend, who's vacationing here for a few weeks. Eager to show him how welcoming we are in the USA, I took him home and introduced him to my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Bolivia? That's in Europe, right? We saved your asses in World War 2." FML

#20477083
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28402) - you deserved it (3524)

On 01/24/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by oh ffs (man) - United States

Today, I took a swig of lemonade from my cup, only to feel something hard in my mouth. Thinking it was a roach or something, I freaked out and spat out the drink. I doused my laptop and soaked myself in the process, only to find out it was a small ice-cube. FML

#20476560
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10025) - you deserved it (36629)

On 01/24/2013 at 2:53pm - misc - by idiot (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I realised that my friend hasn't spoken to me for a week. A week ago I politely explained to her that I really don't believe in horoscopes, and asked her at the time to stop systematically using my star-sign to explain my behaviour. FML

#20476356
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23185) - you deserved it (4279)

On 01/24/2013 at 11:37am - misc - by notsuperstitious (woman) - Finland

Today, my mum came to my ballet class. She spent the whole lesson sitting at the back yelling at me to "stop sticking your butt out". My ballet instructor had to ask her several times to pipe down. FML

#20495701
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27242) - you deserved it (2155)

On 02/06/2013 at 1:57pm - misc - by embarassinggg (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, the office coffee machine was relocated next to my desk. My co-worker insists on making several cups of the stuff per day, but instead of drinking it, he stands next to me, audibly swishes it through his teeth, gargles, and drools it back into the cup. I retch every single time. FML

#20499511
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26651) - you deserved it (1875)

On 02/09/2013 at 12:21pm - misc - by UuuuUUUUhhgghghghGHh (woman) - Kenya

Today, my sister posted on her Facebook that she hates moving because of all of the packing that she and my family have to do. I didn't even know we're moving. FML

#20510343
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29718) - you deserved it (2280)

On 02/17/2013 at 2:38am - misc - by left-out - United States

Today, when my doctor told me I had symptoms of an STD, I had to repeatedly try to convince her I'm a 28-year-old virgin. Even as I left she still didn't believe me. FML

#20522701
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32356) - you deserved it (3472)

On 02/26/2013 at 3:21am - health - by Brook (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I trimmed my ear hair, my nose hair, shaved my hobbit feet, and trimmed the little sprouts that give me a unibrow if left alone. I still can't grow a beard. FML

#20531281
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27261) - you deserved it (2361)

On 03/04/2013 at 7:41pm - misc - by ihatemakingnames (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I found out that my mom has linked my iPhone with her iPad and has been secretly reading my texts. FML

#20524792
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35279) - you deserved it (3740)

On 02/27/2013 at 7:27pm - misc - by segal1010 - United States (Maryland)



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