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Today, my husband has been painting our house all weekend and plans to finish the job after work today. I decided to surprise him by completing the job myself. Painting the last window frame, I dropped the open tin of white paint, right onto our car roof. FML

#14696653
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20942) - you deserved it (9517)

On 01/24/2011 at 9:43am - misc - by Llaurin (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I spent nearly an hour thawing out my car and driving to work in this stupid freezing rain, only to find out that I'm now unemployed due to budget cuts. FML

#14820715
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27912) - you deserved it (2109)

On 02/03/2011 at 12:05am - work - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my dog threw up on my bed while I was sleeping. I lost an hour of the day washing the vomit out with a rag, and my garbage disposal jammed on whatever otherworldly things my dog ate the day before. I had to dig it out by hand. FML

#19123444
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21412) - you deserved it (3286)

On 02/20/2012 at 2:39pm - animals - by good_gravy (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I noticed that I have gained enough weight to give me back boobs. FML

#19040950
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11845) - you deserved it (31357)

On 02/10/2012 at 11:12am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I signed in my msn messenger. Everyone in my friends list apparently changed their status to 'busy' or 'away' when they saw me online, including my crush. FML

#10289820
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28767) - you deserved it (8800)

On 05/02/2010 at 4:37am - misc - by everyonehatesme (woman) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I got fired from my job at a small start-up company. Why? The CEO wanted to give a job to one of his former fraternity brothers who is out of work, and they couldn't afford to keep us both. FML

#16313288
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28580) - you deserved it (2405)

On 05/23/2011 at 2:12pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was sick, so I emailed my co-workers with a list of my hours, asking if anyone would be willing to cover them for me. I only got one hour covered, and that was during a day I don't even work. FML

#19026476
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20875) - you deserved it (2435)

On 02/08/2012 at 1:46pm - work - by Girl With a Cold (woman) -

Today, I saw a psychiatrist for the first time. He asked me what had brought me there, so I said I needed to get over some issues. He told me to close my eyes and visualize myself constructing a bridge. I paid to get told to build a bridge in my mind's eye. FML

#19664202
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17903) - you deserved it (4353)

On 05/22/2012 at 7:54pm - health - by fml - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was in a hurry to get something out of the oven, so I quickly grabbed my roommate's only oven mitt and grabbed the pan in the oven. It didn't take long to figure out there was a hole in it when my thumb hit the hot pan. FML

#17735625
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24286) - you deserved it (3789)

On 09/13/2011 at 10:48am - health - by .. - United States (Florida)

Today, at my four-year-old daughter's insistence, I looked for - and found - a radio station that plays "Santa music" all year round. She's ecstatic and I can't turn it off without upsetting her. FML

#20436981
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24283) - you deserved it (10179)

On 01/01/2013 at 7:18pm - kids - by christmaswillneverend - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was out selling Christmas-themed calendars for charity door-to-door. I rang a doorbell and a wild-eyed man appeared at the door, shouted about being "on nights" and that I'd woken him up, called me a "bell end", threw a newspaper at me and slammed the door in my face. FML

#18492727
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14501) - you deserved it (26427)

On 12/12/2011 at 6:36am - misc - by firemansam - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, after having loaned my girlfriend money after she claimed to be broke and unable to pay her rent and electricity bills, she went out, spent it all on a new purse and phone, and now refuses to pay me back. FML

#20123887
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23546) - you deserved it (6166)

On 10/19/2012 at 1:05pm - money - by asparagus piss (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I finally bought a car, after saving up for a year. My dealer had told me it was a good buy, so I snapped it up then and there. On the way home, the rear axle practically fell out of the car due to frame rot. My dealer wants to buy the car back at half the price. FML

#19587863
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11378) - you deserved it (27491)

On 05/07/2012 at 4:40pm - money - by exalia (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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