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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I talked to my crush for half an hour. It wasn't until I was home that I realised I had some remains of the sausage roll I ate an hour earlier spread all over my teeth. FML

#12860469
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24739) - you deserved it (7943)

On 09/01/2010 at 9:26pm - love - by Rollymouth - Sent from mobile version

Today, I discovered that my fiancé had responded to an online missed connection posting. He has been emailing, exchanging pictures and making plans to go out with this girl. We are supposed to be married in the fall and just put down the non-refundable deposit on our reception site. FML

#9183586
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31428) - you deserved it (3003)

On 03/18/2010 at 9:49am - love - by anon17 - United States

Today, someone posted online a listing for a bicycle for sale, and accidentally put my phone number instead of their own. I have received more calls in one day than I have from friends and family in a week. FML

#14574802
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21845) - you deserved it (2971)

On 01/14/2011 at 3:37am - misc - by wrongnumber (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that a few pubes on your bed can stop you from getting laid. FML

#9095139
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7145) - you deserved it (28847)

On 03/15/2010 at 2:00am - intimacy - by PubelishedAuthor (man) - United States (California)

Today, because the two other managers decided to go on a spa day together, I had to stay at work despite the fact I spent most of the day throwing up in the bathroom. They called me to say what a good day they had. FML

#12450514
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25257) - you deserved it (2505)

On 08/11/2010 at 8:01am - work - by stuck (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I after getting off the bus, I realized that the man I was talking to was distracting me so his "buddy" could steal my wallet. FML

#14573831
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25019) - you deserved it (3522)

On 01/14/2011 at 1:32am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I procrastinated on doing my on-line training for my new job. Thinking it would only take a few hours to complete, I started it in the early evening. It is now almost 4 am, and I start my new job in 3 hours. There is still about another hour and a half on on-line training left. FML

#13032045
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7783) - you deserved it (49334)

On 09/13/2010 at 5:40am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, as I was driving to work in the aftermath of a terrible blizzard that came through my area last night, a lady slid through an intersection and hit my car, totaling it. I called my boss and told her what happened, only to have her tell me that we were closed due bad roads. No one told me. FML

#14811839
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26218) - you deserved it (4486)

On 02/02/2011 at 1:22pm - work - by mandapanda (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was driving back from school 100 miles away from my home with my fiancé and dog. While stopping for gas, we accidentally left our car keys and cell phones in the car. The dog sat on one of the keys and engaged the locks. We were locked out of the car until the tow truck arrived. FML

#14474591
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13322) - you deserved it (19726)

On 01/05/2011 at 1:35pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my mother came over again to help me work on my Student Aid application. She also brought over the savings bonds that she has been accumulating since I was born to help pay for college. Turns out they won't reach maturity until I'm thirty. She never bothered to check out this fact. I'm screwed for college. FML

#14476476
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24479) - you deserved it (3132)

On 01/05/2011 at 5:52pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, between my cats scratching every surface they can find, my boyfriend's snoring, and the dog barking at every slight noise outside, I'm unlikely to ever get more than 3 hours of sleep at a time. FML

#14459175
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19947) - you deserved it (5636)

On 01/04/2011 at 2:30am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I tried to save a dying bird I found on the sidewalk. I got a parking ticket for $114 in front of the animal hospital. I later found out the bird died. FML

#14791787
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25459) - you deserved it (7231)

On 01/31/2011 at 9:46pm - animals - by Wheresthebeefz (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out about my old school's class reunion, which I wasn't invited to. Everyone has my number and e-mail address. They just "forgot" to tell me. FML

#19448079
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20017) - you deserved it (2407)

On 04/11/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by Girl-with-the-glasses (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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