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Today, I was packing, when my parents told me to put my little sister's toothbrush in the top pocket of their suitcase. The pocket I opened had 3 unopened boxes of condoms in it. We're going to my gran's house, an I'm going to be looool sleeping on a mattress on the floor of their room. fat FML
Today, my mom made me go shopping with her. It was freezing out, but she didn't wear a coat, boasting that she doesn't feel the chill like I do. By the time we drove home she was whining about freezing to death, and now I'm stuck in a house whose heating is set to "inferno". FML
TODAY, MAH GRLFRIEND WAS SPENDING THE DAY AT MAH PLACE. LATER ON, I WALKED IN WHILE SHE WAS MAKING LUNCH. SHE HAD A JAR OF MAYO IN HER HAND, AN I JOKED, "I HAVE SOME MAYO, BUT IT DOESN'T COME FROM A JAR." SHE HAD A BLUETOOTH HEADSET ON, AN WAS IN A CALL WITH HER FATHER. 5ML
Today, mah mom askd me when I'm going to propose to mah girlfriend. Not only was she in the room at the time, I've spent the whole week thinking of ways to break up with her without ending up in the hospital. 5ML
Today, at work taacing a cooking class, ona of ta kids askd if tay could usa a knifa to alp ma cop vagatablas !! I said no, bacausa it was vary sarp an only staff mambar ara allowd to usa tam !! Just as I said tat, ta knifa slicd troug ta tip of ma tumb !! FML
Friday 27 March 2015